THE SILVER LINING

raye ke?

2011-11-05T00:18:00.000-07:00

BUSY BUSY BUSY! oh wow i've been complaining for the past few weeks i believe. yes, school is getting busier, tougher, and annoying! lol i just felt like travelling and HAVE FUN out there. aigooo! studying on friday night is even worse, and yet people back home is busy preparing for the eid. nice gituuuuuu!! arghhh! I WANNA GO HOMEEEEE BADLY!!! glad that my family called when i was studying in the library? lol, good timing indeed! been busy back then that i couldnt have time to talk to my mom. difference in time is urrghh, annoying! everyone is home, not everyone coz some siblings have to go to their in laws'. but of course half of us is already 'macam nk pecah rumah'. big family indeed! i even asked my mom what should i cook for the eid? n seriously i jot down the recipe in my BMSC notes.lol. but the best part was when my mom showed me BAJU RAYE that she bought from her so-called Cik Kiah Bandung trip with my aunts and uncles. Seriously baju raye for next year? mak cakap 'adik balek malaysia baru ukur n hantar jahit acording to her new fashion style. haha seriously balek malaysia?! i wish i have that much money to go homeeeeeee! aigoo naseb baek tahan nanges though kne bahan with my own niece since my friends were around. humm how i MISS THEM badly right now. homesick gituuuu! :P

ur just not up to my standard, gitu!

2011-10-10T22:13:00.000-07:00

malaysians loveeee drama!

arghhh stop pissing me off pls!

coz i'm boiling inside, seriously

when i reach the limit

u wouldnt see me as i am right now

aaarrghhhhh marah hell org yg tak paham bahase ni!!!

damn, i got my own so-called standard, whatver!

ok, that kind of person is not meant for TKC girls!

like seriously, i think none of my PHOENIX sisters can handle that person!

hahah overr gitu!

wow i'm glad that i had a 'girls talk' with a friend that i could actually trust here :)

wallaweyhhh, banyak betol drama dalam hidup ni

All is well iA

2011-09-21T23:33:00.000-07:00

org cakap jgn mengeluh, tak baek

oh well i got so many things to say

but maybe i'll just talk about some stuffs

i'm BACK in Saskatoon, a place that I would love to explore more

hidden beauty, indescribable uniqueness n yes beautiful people

so here I am, meeting my awesome Toon hooligans again

i went back for 2months but they feel like it was more than that

'how was ur bf? did u lose weight? how's travelling? etc.

'i see ur awesome pictures'!

the first 2 questions mmg tak bole blah

well i didnt meet my so called bf, but i met my crazyyyy PHOENIX girlfriendsssss

i didnt have a good apetite for some reasons but i ate what i needed to eat

oh n i SWEAT a lot too!

balek malaysia turon 2.5 kg okaaay! gilo

basically the 2 months that i spent wasnt toooo great

time flew so fast eh?

i was a bit disappointed that i didnt get to have 'my own time with mom'

i wanted to travel or at least shopping would do

just like last time

she got other commitments i believe :(

but basically i had a good time with my family n relatives

2 years shouldnt feel like 20 years, hopefully

looking forward to graduate n earn my own money! :)

i had a bad dream a few days ago. something related to my family, a sad one n i even cried badly. n yet, i got a call 2 days ago from Malaysia. mak was admitted to the hospital. only Allah knows how i feel at that time. I was scared to death coz I'm still stuck in Canada if something happens. I was sick that I thought I needed my mom. But I guess mak needs her kids more for the moment. I've been updated by my bro n sys n even my niece about mak's conditions. haish jgnla homesick. All is well iA. yeah keep telling myself to b cool with it or at least act cool about it. get well soon mak! i wish i'm right beside u at this time :(

silence

2011-08-29T10:50:00.000-07:00

believe it or not

being silent is somehow the best weapon

the best thing that u can do

whenever u cant take it anymore

i'm a very sensitive person

n seriously i'm not that 'pure' inside

so yeah, it's better to keep it down

i mean not to fight back

coz i seriously agree with the malay idiom

'idiom' ke?

whatever laa

kerana pulut santan binasa

kerana mulut badan binasa

i believe that once i burst,

i may look VERY mean to everyone

n yes people, i really mean it

Jodoh

2011-08-10T08:06:00.000-07:00

jodoh dan peretemuan

semua tu di tangan Tuhan

tak usah diingat bende yang lalu

mcm la org tu ingat kat kite

hey u woman!

be STRONG la

no matter how hard it's gonna b

ur gonna make it through

forget the past for real

only then everything's gonna b fine

ratio guys to girls kan dah nk balance

ape nk risau?

ececece

even if it takes yearssssss

jodoh tu takkan ke mana

tak payah dicari-cari

it's not something that i really have to worry about eh

n yes i do believe in Him

He has planned something really GOOD iA :)

:(

2011-07-30T22:29:00.000-07:00

this is not the summer that i want

for some reasons

i just cant wait to go back to Canada

maybe i dont belong to this place anymore

or maybe

i'm too sensitive about everything

n even the day i landed

i've already stressed myself out too much

i'll come back again when everything has settled down

eotteohge?

2011-05-13T22:49:00.000-07:00

i managed to 'like' someone again but after i get closer to that someone, (almost everyday jumpe or just online n do crazy stuffs or whatever) i dont feel anything anymore. ouch.not once or twice but couple of times already :( maybe i get bored easily or or they're just not my type! HAHAHA! n please please please dont show interest in me coz i just hate it. i'd rather live without knowing how others feel about me. being in relationship is a serious matter for me coz i just dont give a sh** in my life! no more drama or whatever u wanna call it coz i cant handle it anymore. i'm happy being single but for some reasons i dont like how i feel right now. i'm not being ignorant or deniable of what's happening around me, but i think i'm just too scared of taking the risk! oh what a chicken! what should i do? *ok study rajin2 pastu habeskan duit JPA* perfect! :D

mcm drama la plak!hehe

2011-05-07T22:22:00.000-07:00

i never thought that my 'kampung' yg sgt la kecik where u'll always say 'what a small world' has soooooo many koreans!wow! i'm surprised to see lots of korean guys came to play soccer with us today.haha! siap bole buat korean team lagi n play against us which is like combination of all continents in the world.ecewah! rase mcm dlm drama la plak to hear them saying 'chinca' 'hyung' 'biyan' 'kamsahamida' etc etc. oh damn senyum lebar2 je todaaaay :D:D now i cant wait to go to Seoul coz my awesome korean friend made a good plan for us!ooopppa! *ok gedik gile*

just bear with it :(

2011-04-30T00:15:00.000-07:00

i dont wanna b an asshole

i dont wanna b selfish

no matter how hard it's gonna be

i just have to bear with it

stop complaining,

coz human beings are just like that

not everyone knows how to appreciate others

i shouldnt expect too much in life

so i'll take this as a challenge

to make me stronger insyaallah :)

*only if everyone understands me, i dont think i'll hurt this much :( *

hello :) eh salam sounds better i guess

2011-04-24T01:40:00.000-07:00

ke hadapan blog yg dicintai. i miss u so much. sorry for 'ditching' u for almost 2 months but i guess i'm back now! my dearie place where i can share whatever i want; for the time being i'm pissed for so much sh** that happened but i know i have to endure it.so pls b with me coz i'll need u in the future when i'm done exams.life's not easy. that's what i keep on telling myself n yeah it's something ugly that turned out to b truth. or maybe i should just use this blog to talk about my future.org cakap look for the future, not the past.hell yeah. past is something that's gonna hurt me more :( goodnite world

Say no to BF!

2011-03-03T21:04:00.000-08:00

I know everyone thinks that i wrote this but trust me it wasnt meeeeee!! after having a thorough investigation, i found out that 3 of my frens involved. Omg, they hacked my fb n putting me in a very bad situation coz everyone thinks i'm so desperate!!! it happened on my birthday n everyone could see this stupid status on their home page.come on guys, i'm not that desperadooooo!! Please dont get it wrong, coz i just cant delete the status. i need to explain to everyone that it wasnt me who wrote it n the most important thing is that i hve to b fair to my fren.coz i hacked his fb n telling everyone that he's out of the closet, which simply means he's gay!! LOL.i know it's a bit too much since he's been attacked by his frens like crazy. But unfortunately, i even had worse than that!!! Everyone is making fun of me at school regarding the resume thingy n many people think i'm desperate for bf!! Durrhhh, my main point here, i dont give a damn to have a BF coz i like my single life now.well, i may flirt around, n hang out with any guys that i want but never crossed in my mind to have a serious relationship in the meantime! Of courseeee!! Being single is so much fun, so girlsss out there, SAY NO TO BF!! Suro mak je cari calon laki, ape susah!! Hahaha!

Heart attack!

2011-03-01T22:26:00.001-08:00

I didnt expect anything on my birthday n i wasnt in a good mood either.Pee-em-es maybe! But anyhow i tried to give my very best expressions to everyone, so i act as cool as i can. All the wishes on fb n text messages really made my day, i mean according to southern hemisphere.if i'm home, i'll probably celebrate it with my sister n nephew since we have the same birthday. Homesick, feeling so depressed with everything, missing someone that i shouldnt, that's the worse state of emotion that i couldnt handle. I even waited for a call that will never happen again. So i decided to stay in school till very late, feeling anxious of what's gonna happen whn the clock strikes 12.i'm telling everyone that i'm not gonna throw a party n i'm not planning to have a party as well since i'm not in a good mood.so nothing happens at 12 coz i was walking home at that time :((

I opened the door. Assa..(trying to give salam) someone came out from the closet n seriously i swear to god that was the most scariest shock that i ever had! I screamed like crazy n i think i might even hugged my friend right away.but thank god i didnt coz that could b a big scandal in school.haha!shoot, seriously it was a 'HEART ATTACK' of the year, my heart hurts a lot but maybe because of too much shis*** too! Ooppss! n yeah they've actually planned so many things for me.well planned, seriously!! Too much drama, too much cheating so that i wouldnt notice anything. The cheesecake, gifts, food, movie, shisha n we stayed up till 4am. Who cares,it's my birthday!

So yeah that's the only picture that i got on my birthday.too much surprises that i couldnt snap anything.but one thing for sure i'll remember my 21st birthday forever.u guys are awesomeeee!! :))

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my toon town friends are just awesome! :)

2011-02-28T00:45:00.000-08:00

reading week is over!! the week is not spent wisely but i had soooooo much fun with my friends here!! having our so called parties maybe every 2 days, doing some crazy stuffs, staying out late that we even had to wait for the first bus in the morning. those days were awesome coz i had crazzyyyyy people around. being in saskatoon isnt a bad choice after all coz i never thought i would meet those people in my life. they're from all over the world so as time passes we manage to learn different cultures n languages. during the break, i didnt travel at all, but only went to Table Mountain for snowboarding. omg, that was the best snowboarding trip so faaarrrr! tho i didnt manage to master the forward carving n the turns, but i'm still happy with my snowboarding skills right now. n i just love my snowboarddd!! hehe.next winter i will aim for Whistler Mountain, the place where they used for winter olympics.

since i only slept for 1 hour 2 days ago, so yesterday i end up sleeping for almost 17 hourssss!! like seriously that was the longest sleep that i ever had in my life!! now i should just go for my new resolution which is not to skip claaassesss at all!! hehe

jgn pertikaikan please!

2011-01-30T00:10:00.000-08:00

kalau org kate itu rezeki, bole tak jgn pertikaikan?? dah tuhan nk bagi org tu 2nd chance, terime jela! aarghhh!!! and please, bile bercakap tu tlg fikir org kiri kanan dulu bole tak?? eee,, pissed me off betol!! and as for myself, even though i screwed up ICPU n didn't pass the cut-off point but at least i tried my best when i'm here!! and alhamdulillah because i learn from my mistake, i think i even did better than some people who passed the cut-off point! so what i wanna say here is that, tlg jgn pertikaikan rezeki org laen bole tak? mane la tau org yg x berape nk perform mase pre-university akan perform lagi gempak kaw2 tahap mega tu?? haaa, tuah aym nampak di kaki, tapi tuah manusia siapa yg tau? so fikir-fikirkan la ye!

this is just a thought yg dah lame disimpan. lame dah, dari dulu lagi.tapi today baru nk rase luahkan.ecewaaah!

hello there!

2011-01-24T22:08:00.000-08:00

hey hey!i know it's been a while that i didnt update my blog. so many things going on that i just wanted to keep them for myself. oh yeah, it's been a year since the last time my heart broke into pieces. ecewaaah! but hey, i'm such a tough person now!u jerk, out of my way! i got my own life now.busy busy busy! i dont even have time to think about relationship or whatever u wanna call it but I'M SERIOUSLY HAPPY! this term would be more organized i guess. less time to go for shopping, more time for other activities. being hi-comm for MASA, BSA and joining Horticulture club is enough for the responsibilities part. i'm extremely satisfied with my so-called 'reducing stress' plans right now

working out at the gym, put more weight for the weightlifting part,

running at the track,increase # of laps per week

finish all the tracks for wall climbing as for now i've reached 4/6 tops (faster than what i was expecting)

halaqah every friday and later riadhah with the sisters

badminton for some fridays

yoga for at least once in fortnight to b more flexible. hehe

swimming class is still in consideration

squash when there's more time

more snowboarding trips when i get hired (no money no snowboarding)

futsal every thursday and if we get to the play-off i'll b more than happy

but being the champion for this term is even better :)

and not to forget, IMPROVE MY CLASS ATTENDANCE AND BE ON TIME!!

revision for any exams/midterms or whatever has to be done for at least one week before!!

aarrghhh!!n for those who may concern, I CANT STAND CRYING BABIES ANYMORE!!! do u know that i'm so pissed off to have that kind off ppl in my life?? screw them!! come on, i learn how to survive tooo!! and please please please do improve yourself!! ah kau! kalau anak bongsu takpe jugak nk mengade lebih2. haiyak! i always at the receiving end, so dont expect much from me! sorry nk emo kejap. hehe

'awesome' people

2010-12-22T00:22:00.000-08:00

They're awesome coz they

make me smile with a single word

wake me up when i'm 'sleeping'

comfort me when i'm uneasy

wipe my tears when i'm crying

and

...

.......

..........

broke my heart till i cant even forgive

and i learn not to love someone wholeheartedly, not even friends, and a special someone

coz trust is not to be betrayed, but to be grasped till the end

to get along with me is easy, but once i get annoyed, dont even think to get my trust coz life is not easy

u should know that and so do i

coz ure one of a kind

2010-11-22T22:00:00.000-08:00

To love someone is HARD, but to forget someone that u loved is HARDer.things happened, n u even think that life is so unfair.but at the end of the day, u'll think that God loves u for showing u the right path. to think positive is EASY, but to think negative is EASIER."Life sucks, jiwe kacau". that will be a spontaneous reaction, but what favours the spontaneity?? maybe i should 'muhasabah diri' n think what n where i went wrong. it must be something, n somewhere along the road. the road that i feel like giving up to go through.hmmm.what a life! be strong my dear soul! coz i know ure one of a kind.nobody will understand u for real :(

Trick-or-EAT, not trick-or-TREAT

2010-11-01T18:20:00.001-07:00

It's halloween but i'm not having culture shock here, to be exact. I've already seen halloween before but only this year i got the chance to experience everything about halloween.not everything, but almost all of them.from pumpkin carving, wearing the costume that is borrowed from a friend, n go around for "trick or eat"!! one thing that i can b proud of is i managed to say NO to all the halloween party invitations which is like 2 or 3.haha.n "trick-or-eat" is not a wrong term that i used coz that's what i did! Go around for non-perishable items, instead of candies coz we're doing it for the food bank! Oh yeah,lots of people post articlessss on fb regarding halloween.to b frank, i dont have the intention to against the hukum, but i just thought what i did is for people who are in need n at the same time i had some fun! We trick to make others to eat!and and i just thought this is the same as what we did during hari raye.go around n visit houses in the neighbourhood n ask for duit raye.pakai baju cantek2, dapat makan, dapat duit.haha. going to the houses n bumped into some kids reminded me of my childhood hari raye.pusing satu kampung, n make sure pocket penuh!lol.after all, i know i'm not yet a good muslimah, but i just dont want people to judge me as a "minah yg dh culture shock habes after dok oversea". Hmm, i do accept advices, but in a good way :)

P/s:jgn sesape terase sudah, coz this is just a thought ye

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C.O.N.F.U.S.E.D

2010-10-16T18:47:00.001-07:00

I always know what i want.but now i'm seriously confused!! Walking in this path is not FUN at all if i dont know how to really appreciate people around me. Oh hati, asal la kau SENSITIF sgt!! Ya allah, give me the strength to go through anything that i have to face.amin

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hey awak!

2010-09-10T09:27:00.000-07:00

u surprised me, but u really made my raye.

SeLaMaT HaRi RaYe n MaAf ZaHiR BaTiN to u too

thanx for the wish, i appreciate it so much

just so u know i'm happy to get ur text,

but i just dun have the guts to reply.

it's still in me, if u know what i mean.

what's our theme??

2010-09-05T09:21:00.000-07:00

"ape tema kite??

SEDONDON SECOCOK SEPADAN!"

and whatsoeva "SE' la!

hahaha..someone made me laugh with this!

huh, layan jelaa~~

forgive n forget

2010-09-01T09:39:00.000-07:00

i couldn't see the difference between forgive n forget,

but what i know is those two things complement each other.

u cant never forgive if u cant forget n vice versa.

one good point here is:

even at this point, i still cant forgive n forget!

oh what a life!

anak-anak

2010-08-27T09:20:00.000-07:00

these days i tend to spend more time with kids.i already have 5 nieces n 7 nephews. i'm quite close with each of them, but only some of them are my favorites! hahah.. bukan nk pilih kasih, but i'm just being realistic. sape yg x mengade lebih, pandai amek hati, pandai make me laugh smpi golek-golek, for sure la i syg, kan??haahaaa..those anak-anak are my lil sweethearts la! if i happen not to get married at all pon, i guess my nephews n nieces are all there to cheer me up. ecewaaahhh!!

this is Umar. he got a new hair cut, n perangai pon makin menjadi-jadi! fuuuhh!

notice the scars on his face!! sgt nakal, but i like him tho! :)

this kid eats a LOT! she keeps on eating, xkesah org kiri n kanan. n she calls herself "dedek".haha

this is what she did when i asked her to 'senyum nmpak gigi'. oh yeah, she's the one singing Bieber's BABY as "bibik, bibik oh, bibik, bibik, oh" instead of "baby baby oh". HAHAHA

budak-budak ni gaye je lebih.haish

after shuffle yg x brape nk menjadi.pengsan sorang2!

here are random pics for some of the nieces n nephews. i have a lot more, tp malas nk cari dh.haha

oh yeah, mase my aunt meninggal haritu, i gotta see some other nephews n nieces jugak. my cousin's kids.

when he passed me, i thought it was a girl. but when i looked at him again, sah2 la si Danish. it's been a while that i din get to see him.rambut pon dh pjg, cm Noh Hujan pon ade.eceee..

it's so hard to get his picture. well, bdk ensem bajet mahal la kan?!hehe

this is Elina.i found it a bit hard to communicate with her coz she can only understand English n Srawak! :D

surprisingly, she's even bigger than her elder sister!wallaweh kan??n i could still remember when she mad at someone, she was yelling ala2 mak datin gitu: "hey u!!blablabla". ouch.

unexpected

2010-08-23T07:38:00.000-07:00

"mak, mak, adk mimpi gigi patah malam td"

i was crying while telling my mom this, n if i'm not mistaken, it was last month.

we have this belief;

whre having such dream means that thre will b someone close to us that gonna leave us forever.

i never thought that it'll b my own aunt, Rohani Zakaria a.k.a Makni.

she's the only my mom's siblings that i din get to see when i reached malaysia.

n i din even remember when was the last time i get to see her.

but i'm still glad that i could still see her for the very last time

i was in kl, with my other siblings n it was after sahur when i got the news.

ya allah, only He knows how i felt at that time

evryone was rushing to Alor Star, Kedah, from all over Malaysia i guess

evryone speed up, n some even reached 180km/h, just not to miss the jenazah

alhamdulillah, evryone made it, n it was good to see Makni's face again.

she looks like my mom, n of course la coz she's her big sister,kan?

n at the same time i imagined what if that person is my mom??

i culdnt hold my tears evrytime i think about it, coz i think i'll never be ready to lose someone that i love

but Makni's face looks so cool, rase tenang je tengok.

n i even get to kiss her twice, before n after jenazah dimandikan.

muke org meninggal mmg lembut ke??muke Makni pon cm senyum je..

ouch, berair-air jugak kat situ, but they asked to wipe the tears before kissing jenazah

alhamdulillah, Makni looked so good, meninggal pon dlm keadaan beriman, insyaallah

the weather is nice during the funeral, n she's even lucky to die during ramadan

there's so much hikmah for her, with all the prayers from evryone.

she fell while taking wudhuk for solat zohor

she had a stroke attack, admitted to the hospital on friday, n she died on sunday.

it happened too fast, n nobody could expect anything.

Makni is the first one to die in my mom's family tho she's not the eldest

it was a big loss to us coz our silaturrahim is sooooo good.

we have our own 3R (Rohani, Rohana n Ramlah)

Makni's gone, n we only left with my mom n Mak Anjang.

thre will b no more 3R, no more "all the memekak stuffs", no more crazy jokes from 3 of them

we're gonna miss Makni, semoge rohnya dicucuri rahmat.amin

al-fatihah~

current passion

2010-08-17T09:03:00.001-07:00

i dunno y, but i fall in luv in baking cupcakes! Haha. Cupcakes aren't my fav tho, but yeah, i have fun making them, decorating every single cup, with not-so-creative hands.lol.n i guess business is my thing as well.that's y i'm now busy with so-called cupcakes business!! It was just for fun actually, since i've nothing much to do these days.travelling time is over, no more hangouts, no more 'ronggeng' here n thre coz it's time to b mom's lil sweetie.ecewah! Oh here got some pics of my own cupcakes! Please excuse the decoration. I din go to any baking classes anyways, n that's y they're not that awesome ye!!

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When the keys are not there

2010-07-30T02:01:00.001-07:00

I lock it well.if someone knocks it, i wont open it coz the keys are not with me. U stole it from me once n i let it be. u left me alone, but i could do nothing. When others tried to jump in, i dun give a damn. Coz the only thing that i know is u're the one with the keys, n nobody could have the same one

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Terkejut mak, nyah!

2010-07-22T21:48:00.001-07:00

G kl teman cousin g interview.dlm 2 days je, g rabu balek khamis. Tp dh alang2 turon kl kan, mesti la wajib singgah shopping jap. So i went to klcc dgn backpack n all.but the spirit is there la!! Penah ke shopping x semangat?haha.n i think my nafsu shopping is unstoppable la!n yesterday i have to stop swiping my credit card after spending in MNG n Vincci.mmg boros, tho i always think that i've to start saving.tp ntah bile tah.shopping2 pon gune duit sewe rumah, so xyah la nk rase guilty lebih2.ece.ayat nk sedapkan hati.haha.wtv la.my main point here is to crite about what happened yesterday. I bumped into a fren or mayb ex-fren la kot! Skali pandang mmg mcm kenal, but after staring at him for a few seconds, mmg sah2 la kenaaaaal! Sh**! Tu
Mmg first word la yg kuar. I dunno y in the world i have to bump into him. Mmg wrong place, at a wrong time. I dunno whether he saw me but i really hope he didnt la!! Pandang tempat laen dgn secepat mungkin,berdiri tegak, static tergamam n terkesima.shoot, rase nk tercabut jantong! Menggigil jugak kejap! I've to admit that i'm not ready to see any of them at all!! Sumpah gile nk mampos.habes spoil mood shopping sekejap! The old memories came across all of sudden!bengot laa..n plus, his new gf disgusted me la!! Menyampah je tengok!! Sori to say, but it was kind of nightmare to me..urrghhh!!! Siyes x nk jumpe of that kind anymoreeee.. Geraaaaam je rase. Panaasss2!! Eeee..Takot la nyah!! Trase over la plak!!haha. Wtv la. Mayb i've to think of duit jpa yg nk masok nxt week!! Haha.cant wait laaaa!

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ye kawan, i miss u too!

2010-06-21T04:20:00.000-07:00

"cakap kat faraw org rindu die tau :(

ask her 2 take care of herself."

(Faraw,msg ni ***** bg org smlm.pkul 3 pg.)

damn, i feel bad when my fren texted me this. all kinds of feelings came at the same time. we used to have a good time together,hang out smpi x igt dunie, n the best part ble sound depan2!cool gile kan? but u guys ruined evrything la. the world cup makes me feel even worse coz we used to have those 'kutok-mengutok time', football betting(gurau2 punye version la), berlagak pasal jerseys n players, n mcm2 lagi la. but those memories will remain as memories coz i dun think we can go back to that time. betol kate pepatah, sbb nila setitik, rosak susu sebelanga. i can't prtend as if nothing happened, coz thre's no way that i can forget evrything in a short time. but trust me, i MISS u guys toooo!!sangat2 rindu, okay??tgk la nnt, maybe one sweet day, hati ni dh lembut n dh kuat sket, we'll meet up, ok kawan?ksian la ko, jadi mangse keadaan sunggoh!i'm not exactly having a revenge on them, it's just that i'm not ready to face them.fullstop!

ko mmg kawan terhebat la!!

2010-06-05T09:21:00.000-07:00

1st time tgk gambar, mmg caer wo!nk kate ensem, xde la ensem sgt, tp sekadar sedap mate memndang la.based on my taste yek. ntah mcm mane, bole terkenal la plak.ni sume membe punye hal la.bile dh start contact, jadi kawan sudah la kan. nk lebih2, skola lagi kot! mmg langgar my prinsip idop couple mase skola2 ni. mule2 mmg kawan la, tp lame2 dh rapat semacam.klu laki ngan pompuan xde rase pape, mmg abnormal la kot. last2 ktorg decide jadi kawan baek, n xmaw lebih2.tp ntah mcm mane, after spm jd more than bestfrens la plak. klu dh name org brcinte, sume mmg nmpk indah la. even gadoh2 pon bole suke. bnde2 laen xyah ckp la kot, sume rase hebat je.name pun first love, mmg la nk serious coz i'm not da type bercinte utk maen2 yek!! i may not look serious, but i'm f**king serious la kalau dh betol2 masok jiwe ni!! tp bile org kate xde jodoh tu, kne la pasrah utk berpisah, x gitu?? nk trime hakikat dgn sng mmg not so me la!! hati x cukup nk lembut, n asyik nk ikut pale otak sndri je. tp at least try la jugak utk move on n pasrah dgn sume bnde yg happen. cume balek malaysia ni nk dgr explanation yg gempak from mulut org tu so dat bole move on dgn rela hati. pasrah tu mmg pasrah la kalau ditakdirkan jadi kawan je coz we started as frens jugak what?! tp ble ko ckp sume yg ko buat slame ni hipokrit n kte xpatut jadi kawan tu ape???x ke taik kerbau namenye?? n ade hati nk putus kawan cmtu je?? 3 tahun tu bukan sekejap taw!! n bukan senang nk lupe n padam sume memori pasal kauuuuuu!!!! u betrayed my trust! i've had enough! u're the worse thing that ever happened to me!! i hate u like crazy!!i'm gonna revenge, but in my own way!! i'll make sure u'll get what u deserve!! u have to live in guilt coz u make me live in misery. u chose a wrong person la!! u may think that i'm the one that u can simply toy with coz u cheated me for 3 years tp x pernah kantoi at all!!u're such a drama king la kawan!! only if i know why u did this to me, coz i thought that i really know u!! just so u know, i've been so sincere with whatsoever relationship that we had before, but if u really didn't have the heart for me, u better watch out!!! Allah tu maha adil.but if u have good reasons behind all these, i'll think of forgiving u. but for now, bole blaaahhh laaa!! u treat me mcm sampah when our relationship is over. i'm not begging for ur belas kasihan la coz i still have the pride.it's just that i love my friendship more than anything. it's ok if we're not meant to b together, but at least we can still b friends. feeling regret of what we had before is enough to show me who u are. trime kaseh banyak2 la for leaving me with wounds that will never be cured!! "TERBAEK" la dapat kwn cm ko!!! panasssssssssssss jeeeeee!!!!

p/s:please excuse my harsh words readers. i hope this will be the last one. i wanna move on, with at least a better feeling.n rase mcm nk delete this blog coz i wrote so much about him!!grrr...marah sunggoh!!
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it was a blast!

2010-05-05T01:03:00.000-07:00

if people asked me, how do i like saskatoon, i would answer that it's a great place!! my first year in the UofS itself was awesome.i'm so grateful for having such a nice campus, with friendly staffs n GOOD friends. i've learned so many things since i came to a place called saskatoon, or maybe i like to call it as my 2nd "kampong". at first, i found it a bit hard to adapt with the environment, but now i could say that i have saskatoon in my heart.ece..gile ah ayat ni.haha. seriously, my first 8 months are unforgettable.n the time that i spent with my new friends would b in memories forever. all the hangouts, ice cream, asian restaurants, chocolates, movie nights, fun trips,soccer, badminton, squash,gym, dancing classes, yoga, wall climbing, study groups, n so on would b my "kenangan terindah la"!maybe it's because i'm faaar away from my family and my other good friends, that's why i think they have the shoulders that i can cry on, or maybe figures that i can laugh of. knowing them for only a few months is enough to make me feel sad when i have to be apart from them for 4 months. i felt like crying when they sent me at the bus depot before i left to edmonton. they are among the good friends that i've ever known. thanks for brighten up my days with laughter n ur craziness, guys.i'm gonna miss u!! have a good summer, n see ya next term :))

we're planning to have our own time capsule as well. we don't need 100 years to be good friends, coz the only thing that we need is sincerety, n not not to forget, LOVE.

we still have 3 more years to be together, n i REALLY hope that we can have a blast for the time that we have. mmg syg korang la! <3

oh yeah, i'm so happy coz i've got my "BESTFRIEND" back!! *the quotation mark means a lot though*

will U wait for me??

2010-04-22T03:20:00.000-07:00

i've been thinking these days n i've decided on something..i found it hard to forget u n i dunno y i'm so stupid that i'm still waiting for u..i've been stalking ur fb profile for evry single day, i've been waiting for ur txt messages n calls. but i heard nothing from u..maybe i should start to accept the fact that i'm no longer important in ur life n u may not even care bout me anymore.. all my so called "move-on plans" seem to not work out very well coz i still think or maybe relate anything that i do with u..it has been 3 months, but i still can't forget u..i've read an article in ur fb profile, regarding "couple"..it's about the good things of not having that kind of relationship.it made me think though..it'll b great if u dumped me because of that reason.i would probably understand n that's y i came up with a thought. i dun wanna go for a serious relationship, but it'll only be for marriage..it's good that i dun have any feelings in guys anymore.so in 4 years time, my heart should b good to accept someone in my life.someone, which is U! but for now i'm just wondering if u'll b thre for me at that time. WILL U WAIT FOR ME?? i can keep my words that i wont find someone else to replace u coz i just want my heart to b knocked once.it'll b great if u have the same thought as me.and it'll b so goooood if u dont find someone else to replace me..i miss u, but thre's nothing i can do.i can only express it through my writings. n today, it should b our 2nd anni..u might forget about it, but i'll never ever forget it. u, happy anniversary sayang.

this cowgirl misses her cowboy so much!!*ouch*

for some reasons, i really really really want u to read this.but i know it's kinda possible for u to read my post like u used to do.is thre any other way that i can tell u about what i feel??hah!!sudah2 la tu..*ayat from some of my frens* wtv it is, i'll go with the flow..kalau ade, ade la..we can only plan, but ALLAH will decide the BEST for us.insyaallah..

Lepak

2010-04-08T21:48:00.001-07:00

Easter break sgt dimanfaatkan dgn melepak n have fun with frens.

Lepak tepi jln pun jadi la..n frisbee jugak!nice2

Bdk2 jakun tgk sungai.haha

Saskatchewan river yg dh melt

pic taken right before being attacked with a group of kids who thought dat we're BAD strangers.haha.
N then lepak at rocio's place.

Oh yeah,i made kuew tiow goreng.special request from my frens.

We ate kuew tiow goreng n pancakes.mkn smpi kenyang n then maen Wii.tp klu ade rock band lagi best kot.wtv.lepak smpi mlm n then pegi campus. I slept over campus act.Lepak at residence's lounge,tgk tv n then muvee marathon.we watched 3muvees.we ate n talked a lot.so many stuffs.sleep over campus sbb nk tgk bola rmi2 act.haha.man u vs chelsea. Mule2 dh smgt dh.last2 i'm da only one left to watch the game.agak boring kot. Dh la kalah.cm siot je.haish.afta suboh baru tdo,which is only for 3hours. then took shower at the gym.gile sempoi ah.breakfst budk resi supply.n then pegi maen bola.1st time maen at the field coz the weather is so good. 2hours at the field caused my skin to b a bit darker now.but x kesah la..gile puas kot maen.tho thre were only 2girls,i din feel awkward at all.janji niat nk bersukan.ece..ksimpulannye,the long weekend has been spent wisely utk bersuke rie.coz da nxt day,we started studying again,like seriously.hoho.final is just around da corner kot. Oh crap!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

why do i stalk u??

2010-03-31T21:45:00.000-07:00

i stalk ur fb coz i wanna know how are u doing, what are u up to, how is ur new look, who's checking u out, who's the new girl in ur life,how's ur school n everything about u.i checked ur profile every single day coz i dont wanna miss anything about u coz at the end of the day i'll feel bad for not knowing ur current updates. tho all the rumors or so-called scandals are killing me like crazy, i'm still not giving up.maybe one day i'll stop, but for now thre's nothing that i can do.waiting for ur call is like waiting for the rain in the drought.i could've agreed with the "monthly deal" coz one year is too much for me.i feel regret tho.only if u know how much do i miss to talk to u. not calling or texting u at all doesnt mean i've thrown u away frm my life.it's just that i CAN'T n u cant imagine how hard i tried to go through this.i believe that u dun really care about it anymore coz i can see that u're having a gud life now.yes, i'm ur BIG STALKER, but please dun stop me from doing this coz i wanna know what does a relationship mean to u.even at this point, i still have the same feelings towards u.it'll be such a relief if thre's a way out for this.i just wanna fix it, but i know we cant get whatever we want coz we're not the GOD.only Allah can do n get whatever He wants.evryday i'll be hanging out with some friends, doing assgnmnts n have some fun. i'm happy when i'm with them, but when i'm alone i'll start to think about YOU!!i just dunno what should i do coz i dun wanna get rid of u.i know this post makes me sound desperate, again.but it's not a crime to have such feelings, right?ni la hati pompuan.fragile sgt.emo melampau!sket2 nk down, nk cdeyh2..owh crap!!i wanted to go to the riverside today.nk jerit kuat2.but my frens replied my msg a a bit late.klu pegi sorg2 nnt org kate gile plak.aargghhhh!!wtv.sumpah RINDU!!

a walk to remember

2010-03-30T01:27:00.000-07:00

i was craving for sushi.the last time that i had sushi was during my birthday.so i went to a japanese restaurant in downtown with 3 frens, including "T".owh yeah, we ate n talked a lot, that we spent 2hours in the restaurant. thre's one time that i came out with an idea, whre we have to start using our own language. Rocio n T speak Spanish, while Hang speaks Vietnamese. "ok, how do u guys say let's go??"i couldn't really get the word from Hang, but for spanish, it'll b "bamos"!lbeyh kurang la..but they like our "JOM"!n they can still remember it till now coz it's easy hey.next, how would u say when u're going to give something to someone, like "here" or in malay we just say "NAH!!" owh, this is my favourite coz in vietnamese, they say it as "DIE".sumpah lawak when all of us start to use it.die,, die,, we cant eat the sushi anymore..haha..galak gune that word!!we ate a lot, sgt FULL, smpi xlarat nk jalan.i din even have the energy to carry my bag.xpasal2 T jadi mangse bawak my bag.heh..kekenyangan yg melampau leads to mengantok yg melampau.so we went to Hang's room, to drink coffee.coz after that we have to continue doing assgnmnts n studying. it was maghrib n i din hv much time left to pray.so i had to pray in Hang's room.mak aih, consciousnye nk solat dpn dorunk sume.last time solat dlm kete ok lagi.but seriously i have no choice. i'm glad that they respect me while i'm praying by not making so much noise.they're a bit curious as well coz it's like my first time praying right in front of them. i wish i can share many things about Islam with them.they're good frens, not the type yg agak wild.even when we're in the restaurant and on the bus, we talked about our religion n cultures.Rocio n T are Catholic but Hang doesnt have any religions. it's good to have frens that can share many info with u n i feel happy too for telling them a lil bit about Islam. that night we were doing assgnmnts in a classroom, till i din realise that i've missed the last bus!oh gosh!!i forgot that it was Sunday, n the bus service stopped earlier than usual.man, how should i go back?i dont wanna walk in the middle of the night alone, coz last time my housemate told me not to walk home from school at night again.but suddenly T offered to walk me home.i was like, WHAT??are u suree??coz it'll b like half an hour walk.but he said it doesnt matter coz he always go for a walk at night n the weather is good as well.n he just din want me to walk home alone. alololo..sweetnyee..cettt!!*jangan caer!!*n yeah, he walked me home, n we talked about so many things on our way.that reminds me of a walk that i had with someone.it's a walk to remember, that i can't even forget till now.if i were so strong, i would've thrown the memories for like thousands of miles away.it's just that i can't. to b frank, i miss that person badly.. :(((( but back to "T", i think he has the potential to be a muslim. sometimes he used my laptop to check his emails, n he told me that his stepdad always sends him emails about God, n some messages with good lessons. he's quite close with his stepdad.he said that his stepdad will be so happy if he convert. *deep down in my heart, i'll b waaay happy if he becomes a muslim* at least his stepdad influences him by portraying good examples n all, that even make him not to smoke, drink, get involved with wild parties and so forth.ntah la..i just go with the flow.for now, i need to focus on studies.maen2 jugak.lepak2 jugak. alahai..ble la bole byr bil tepon ni..ssh kot nk contact sume org.eh silap, ssh kot org nk reach me.haaha..tbe2 rase rmi peminat.ngahahha.sengal~~ *ni la padah x pandai jimat duit.tp duit habes sbb byk spend on food, xsalah, kn??at least bkn habes sbb njoy x bertempat*

bile dh jumpe satu kepale

2010-03-26T17:40:00.000-07:00

seriously, this term byk enjoy.byk hangout, byk maen, byk segala bnde la.klu last term bole kre brape kali turon downtown tp dis term xterkire kot.kawan2 sume best, especially jumpe yg satu pale, yg sporting tahap mega, n jenis pandai balance between maen n studies.i can still remember whn i was struggling with 3classmates, Rocio Luis n Michael for VSEPR lab online assgnmnt.it's a 3-hour assgnmnt n we started doing it at the same time.siap kre, mcm nk lumbe lari plak.but the assgnmnt sgt mencabar jiwe dan rage coz thre are questions of diffrent levels n in order to proceed, evry level has to be perfect.if u happened to get 1out of 25 blanks wrong, u have to restart, but with diffrent questions.perghhh!!gle ah..we're stressed up, smpi mnjerit2 jugak dlm library tu.sgt kecoh kot, smpi org keliling pandang2.library la katekan. but we cooperated n helped each other.i'm super bad at this topic, so i always asked them to check for my answers before submitting.thre's one time i felt like giving up coz i only have one attempt left in order to proceed.sgt rase nk NANGES, but they tried to comfort me.takut, xnk jadi cm michael.balek awal sbb he has used all the 5 attempts.klakar kot.cm maen game je, kalah kne balek awal.pasrah gle kot n i asked Rocio to click on the "grade answer" button n i left to the washroom.huhu.but miracle happened coz i managed to proceed to the nxt level.melompat jugak dekat library tu ha..n we tried our best in the nxt level, but we're not lucky enough to complete evrything in time. seriously that was the worse online assgnmnt that i've done.sgt menguji kesabaran!!grrrr..but the thing is, the assgnmnt only worth 1% n we're struggling like crazy with it!!bagos ke x bagos ni?hermm..n then we went to DQ for ice cream!!ubat tension tu!huhu..n this time Hang joined us.we had a good time thre,sumpah kecoh!haha..ala2 nk release tension..

the next day we're invited by a fren to go to LOUIS for USSU film festival.herm,, LOUIS is not a good place actually.ala2 PUB tp on campus.cuak jugak nk pegi that place for the first time.tp pk sbb nk support my fren punye movie, so i just went.muke cuak, tp kne tolak ngan my fren.perghhh..siyes bau beer!!busuk kott!!tp rupe2nye that place bkn bar semate-mate tp kre restaurant jugak.owh, now i know.*niat kne betul tu*huhu..i had fun watching the muvees by all the participants.creative n innovative sume.but of course i voted for my fren's muvee.for me it was a good muvee, but he din win tho he got the best cheer from the people.pelik jugak!adeyh..

Sempat maen kissing n love game.haha

then we went to DQ again!!haha..mmg tmpat lepak terbaek la.n for sure for ice cream!:))

owh, we had goooooooddd times here.there were 6 of us.rancak berborak, smpi x igt dunie.tmbh lagi melayan my new fren yang mabuk.i thought he's a muslim coz he's from lebanon n name pon ala2 muslim.skali mase kat LOUIS, pegi order beer..naseb baek "T" x minum at all.another good point for him!haha..

Em, back to my fren yg mabuk tu.*not in this pic.tersorok* mak aih..ckp pon dh mcm ape dh.tp nk ckp byk gak tu.siyes lawak!!haha..n then we went to study till midnight..njoy mmg njoy, tp assgnmnt x leh lupe kot!that's y i like mereka2.. :))

one word.RINDU.

2010-03-23T01:09:00.000-07:00

rindu mak.n last week borak ngan mak 3-4days berturut-turut :)awesome2..rindu abah.tp asyik xde chance nk borak. :( rindu abang akak sume, n dpt borak wif some of them je during family gathering@bukit jalil.mereka berlagak sbb tgh makan besar, with lauk-pauk yg marvellous, cooked by cheffs terhebat, mak n k.jehan. n mereka berlagak duit bonus maseh byk lagi.em, mereka sume xsabar nk kne PAW tu!xpe, tggu kepulangan adk kesayangan korang!haha.rindu ank2 sdare.mcm2 kerenah can be seen from the webcam.baby umar dh pndi jalan, makin montel, tp maintain putih+jambu. n he smiled at me!ntah kenal lagi ke x.heh.baby Oni dh kuros, makin chomeyl+cantek, tp agak sombong.ciss, nnt asu jugak yg mama korang cari to babysit! Amal still maintain hero hindustan.hnsem lagi.n JAffni??my hero yg maintain gemok+lawak.die merajuk sb xdpt mainan before dat, but when i called him, he came to the laptop.i showed him my iphone, dgn muke belagak, telling him about the games that i have.as usual, *terlopong* budak tu!tros baek from merajuk!!sbb he wanted to berlagak wif me jugak!!durh!we were talking n teasing each other.i know it sounds childish for me, but i just cant help it.jaffni is like my fav ank sdare coz die yg paling lwk!*x pilih kaseh, ok?* die bajet ensem, tp x ensem sgt pon.slalu terlopong n tunjok his lubang hidung yg besar tu!hahah. n then he said, "asu, kte dh KUAT da!!"..ece, belagak!nk cari gaduh la tu!alahai..we used to fight, n he always bully me coz he thinks he's stronger than me..badan byk lemak nk lawan dgn i yg agk tulang, mmg saket laa..adeyh..n i rindu my darling girlfriends, da PHOENIX sisters.happy like hell after dpt borak wif my long-lost badak!lame gle kot x boraaaakkkk!!but still, xpuas.need to have a REAL talk later.n NQ is always thre to hear my inner screams,to jump into my current feelings, n to cry together coz we're at the same point, the weakest one. rindu mereka.those girlfriends that will shre good things, that will make my day a blast one, B, aness, zan, auni, atul,dan mereka sume.but if i miss them, i could do something to get them.for now i miss someone badly, but thre's nothing that i can do to reach that person. it has been 2 months, but i dont think i'm over him. in one month time, it'll b our supposedly 2nd anni.owh crap!!i'm such a LOSER!!memories, pls dont chase me..or maybe i'm the one who has to forget the memories!!

the weather is good now.tho i'm not in a good mood, but i always try my best to keep myself happy. last weekend, i did nothing much.but went for a walk with my housemate on saturday was a good one!

makin hari makin syg saskatoon :))

n on sunday, somebody borrowed me car..

driving in saskatoon??hell yeahh!

80km/h is gud enough for the first attempt..

naseb baek xde polisssss!!haha

i think he's the one!

2010-03-19T13:28:00.000-07:00

i wanted to share this thing earlier, but i dunno why, i went blank when i was about to write it.hermm, dat's ok coz i'm writing it now. it'll b a bit funny coz i just wanna talk about the latin guy that i've mentioned earlier.let's call him as "T". i found him as an intresting one coz each day he makes me to know more about him. that day we were struggling in the chem lab, answering some "stupid" questions, whre the TA also din know how to explain it to us.owh yeah, we were quite unlucky for getting the hardest set of questions.i was so stressed up at dat time, n i kept on complaining. because i was STARVING at dat time!haha.*tbe jeh* after the lab, we were talking about phy asgnmnt n we decided to do it together.but then he asked me to get some food first n he wanted to treat me!erkk, terkejut seyh!obviously segan, n wanted to tolak dat offer, tp teringat a DARE from my fren bout dis guy!so i just accept it, tho rase segan nk mampos!n he asked me whre i wanna go, either A&W or subway, n i told him thre's nothing that i can get from A&W coz i'm a muslim, so better go to subway!i'm glad that he knows a lil bit about ISLAM coz some of my friends here know nothing about Islam.n at subway, he said that i can get the footlong if i want to coz he knows that i was starving during the lab. ciss, bertambah segan kot!tp sbb lapar nk mampos, i just ordered the footlong tuna.but weird thing happened!i cant even finish it tho i was super hungry.the only person that can make me feel like that is my tuuuuuutt!that person suddenly came into my mind!gosh!!n T told me that he'll b upset if i throw the subway.obviously i didnt!tapaw sudeyh.n when walking back to school, he suddenly told me that his stepdad is a MUSLIM. *tbe2 blur jap. stepdad tu ape eh?coz confuse bapak angkat ke bapak tiri!gle sengal, simple thing pon bole lupe!then trigt cite cinderella with stepsisters.baru la dpt tgkp!*haha.. i was damn surprised, n i asked about his mom!i was so excited to know more!but he said his mom is still a christian n his dad has passed away!alaaaaa...frust gle!!!asl la mak die x convert je??adeyh..no wonder la he knows about muslims.he said his family wont eat pork when his stepdad is around, n they wont eat in front of him during the fasting month.to show their respect. hmmm... now i wanna know more about him! we often hang out together these days, doing asgnmnts together.i found him a bit funny n SWEET!gosh, caer2.thre's one time when we're done with the assgnmnts, he got addicted with the games on my iPhone.haha.n he even gave me his fon n do whatever i want, including reading his inbox..gle sempoi la mamat ni! xde GF rupenye. good point!hak3..but still, one year younger, XMAW la!haish..n we went to wall climbing yesterday. i was climbing but he didnt coz he had to go to work. he was late for work, but he still come just to be my partner for climbing. he just wanted me to have FUN! fun habes la an.i managed to climb halfway jerrr!!too bad!coz i've used up my energy early on by working out at the gym n playing squash..so i had to give up earlier. mase nk turon, he sempat make fun of me. saje nk bagi i jerit when i was up thre.ngeng~~n he said sori for not spending a lot of time for climbing, n he asked me to come with him nxt time. :)) n one thing that i like about him is the way he treats me as a muslim.he seems to know our batas2 pergaulan, whre he doesnt simply touch my hands or something. i feel comfortable to be friend with him.klu nk pegi solat pon, he'll understand if i spend more time.
i've decided to move on, tp kenape eh, when i was with "T", i can still terbayang my "sejarah hitam". cett, hitam la sgt sejarah tu,an??haha..but then, i still think that it's a gud idea if "T" dpt hidayah to convert. he's such a NICE guy. i dont wanna put any hopes on him, but being his friend is good enough for me :))
he might be THE ONE who can help me to forget that person, but to have a serious relationship, I DONT THINK SO!!

saskatoon vs saskabush!

2010-03-16T22:33:00.000-07:00

i call saskatoon as "kampong" but some of my intrnational frens call it saskabush!but my first winter here proved that saskatoon is such a NICE city!everything depends on how u explore and njoy it. so far, i could tell that my mission for winter is 90% accomplished!!owh yeah, i'm lovinggg it! :)) 2pairs of boots, boxing day shopping, tobogganing, snowboarding, snowfight, skiing, skating, broom ball, n curling. the only thing left is ICE FISHING!! aarrrrgghhhh, i'm sooo going for ice fishing, next winter!i dont care, nk sgt2!!huk3..so, let's summarize them with some picturessssss!!

n now the snow is melting, as the spring as started!!that is when SASKATOON SHINES.. my fren treated me by taking me out n went FLYING..awesome!such a great birthday gift!n somebody treated me in DQ for winning a bet. not really a bet, but actually a dare! n last week, were really having fun with the sunshine.. we went biking around the town, especially the riverside..saskatoon sgt cantik!! yes, my kampung is really nice, with the 7 brideges, n their so called saskatoon berries.whn the summer comes, i'll go to the berries farm, as well as strawberry farm, where we can do strawberry picking.lagi best from cameron highlnds!hehe..there's a lot that u can explore in this small city, n i have 4 years to do it. it's not a busy city, n u can find peace here.

i'm having fun with some sports over here. working out at the gym every week is like a MUST nowadays.n i always have some games to do such as badminton n squash. talking about squash, last week i played with dat "latin guy"!! still remember the one that i mentioned before??!! hahaha..awesomeness!!i have a crush on him!ngahaha..such a nice boy!naseb baek one year younger n non-muslim.kalau x, mmg sangkot habes2 dh..owh yeah, he's such a nice guy!now we're kinda close, as in we always talk or mayb just bump into each other sometimes.hehe.. n one more thing, SOCCER!!org cni pggl soccer, tp actually futsal. can u imagine how does it feel when ur first time of playing turned out to be a real game??man, i was freaking out at first!cuak nk mampos when the captain asked me to play!shaking jugak tgh2 court tu!haha..but i had so much fun hey!!n nxt week, we're going for the play-off! have to win, badly.last time was a draw.wish me luck!

i'm having a hard time with some personal stuffs, but i'm glad that my frens are always there to support me. whn my heart is broken into pieces, thre are friends who helped me to fix it.i've had enough, n it's time for me to move on.it's kholaaaasss!!evryone said so. but i'm not a jerk that will forget all those good memories. but u're such a jerk if u replace me with someone else!!!

when "teen" is over

2010-03-02T19:08:00.000-08:00

i never thought that i can i have a great birthday though i'm milessss awaaay from my beloved ones. but things seem to b good when i get to know great friends who used to b strangers. a day before my "big" day, we went out for bowling.man, it's been a whileeee.i never played bowling since i landed in canada.gleeee rinduuu!!!

n then we went "lepaking' at the river side,taking some pics, n freezing in the cold. nevertheless, sunset in saskatoon is awesome!

n later we had dinner in Afghan restaurant, whre we laughed a LOT, as if the restaurant is ours! this is all because of Raj, with his crazy experiences when he was in "ragging period" at the university back home!hahaha..man, u 're so FUNNY!!!

yes, i had a great time, but at da same time i'm so nervous to wait for the next day..grrrr.. people in malaysia have started sending me messages, with great wishes, but thre's one particular person that i've been waiting for like evry second.i was pretty sure that i wont b having a good clebration like what i had last year, but i'm still hoping for a GOOD one.distance n diffrnce in time din stop me from being appreciated by the beloved ones, n i'm so glad that person called me n made me happy for at least an hour. :)))

it's sux to have a lab on my big day, but my friends here really made my day.i can feel the love in the air..ece

my fren got me this ice-cream barbie cake.comel, an?haha

my wishes are dot dot dot.erk, i said my wishes loudly in front of my frens which are a bit embarassing!haha

my fren ckp x bole sebut kuat2, nnt x kesampaian..erk,,,alaaaaaaaaa!!xpela, ade rezki, ade la an, ade jodoh ade la..kahkahkah

this is where all the continents met, at New Island Sushi! we have people from Europe,Africa, South America n of course, Asia. but NORTH AMERICA is missing??hahaha..xpatot betol!!

i had sooo much FUN during my birthday. Thanx to my international frens for the treat n giftsss!Raj got me a bunny, so that i can remember "bunny" hill, instead of barney!haha.n thomas got me medicine for my injuries.they said i really need it because i'm so active here.ye ke??naseb baek ubat sapu, klu ubat mkn, erk xtermakan la jwabnye..huhu..n the girls got me chocholates, n some stuffs from hallmark.n they want to bring me to the mall for shopping!!uhuk3..terharu nyeee..coz i've stopped shopping afta the last wintr break!hehe

n not to forget to my family n frens back home..kakak2 ku, nice pantun yek!to my beloved sister, k.jehan, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to u too..nnt balek kte celebrate on june 1st, instead,ok??n to my frens, thanx for the wishes, i really appreciate them so muuuccchhhhh!!!luv u guys sgt2!!

*xnk 20,tp nk 'teen' lagi. klu sebot twenteen ok x??*

baru la bole action!! :)

2010-02-28T01:05:00.000-08:00

now i can proudly say that i'm studying in Canada.I think i've tried all kinds of winter games, except one, curling. but i'm going for curling maybe somewhere around nxt week.or may be i've missed some games, but for now, i've tried toboganning,snowboarding,skating, broom ball n finally i went for skiing today!!so baru la bole action sket, kn?x tere pon, but at least penah try.experience tu yg penting!! ye dak??hahhha..man, skiing for the first time was awesome!but da "awesomeness" was triggered by an accident! hahaha..i found it a bit funny though, but it's so painful!while skiing down da bunny hill(for beginners), i cant stop da ski, n i tot dat i will hit my fren at da front. but surprisingly, i just passed him n hit something else, which is a HUT!!

see!look at how "kemek" is dat thing now! n u shud imagine da impacts on me!

"hey, u're bleeding!" i was like, wut??man, pls dont do this to me!!~~

my cheek cant stop bleeding, n da lady in the hut helped me to stop da blood.

nk nanges ke x??saket glee kott!!! *but i can still smiling n laughing though*

with my new "weird" face.pipi seblah bengkak, n dagu as well!hahhha

*TRAUMA kejap*

I feel like giving up, till at one point i wanted to change to snowboarding.but i dunno y, i still gve a try, but feeling so scared of hitting the hut again.saket kot!!but surprisingly, i got to learn how to ski well n how to stop myself! n that led us to da bigger hill!keep moving people!! i was agak "glamour" afta hitting da hut. so like some people just approached me n telling dat falling is a good key to learn!owh yeah! it's totally CORRECT!! i learn faster afta dat incident, as in i never fall again at da barney hill..:)) so it's time for da lift!! owh, thre's another thing.i tried da T-bar to go up on da hill faster, instead of taking da lift.but it's not easy, hey. at first, i tried it alone n fell down terribly.n 2nd time, i wanted to go with shrey, as in to go side by side. but this is more funny coz we fell down badly.n it's not easy to get up with ski!!i dun wanna embarrass myself anymore so i just left n take da lift. but shrey kept on trying for like 4 times.haha.lawak seyh.

T-bar.it looks easy, right?but it is NOT, ppl!

in conclusion, snowboarding is waaaayy easier than *skiing. but snowboarding is a lot of FUN!!!so i wud prefer snowboarding!hehe..it was a gud trip though, having a gud group of friends. thanx guys! it's a good day tho many things happened.ie my "accident". n when Rocio left her bag @ tim horton's in North Battleford which is like 138km away from saskatoon.we reached saskatoon around 7pm, but we had to go back to North Battleford again, just to take the bag since thre's a lot of documents n credit card in thre. so it took us like 3++hour to go thre n come back to saskatoon.n we were almost running out of gas!man, tercuak jugak mase tu!!lampu warning pon dh menyale n we're still in da highway..gosh!!coz da worse case scenario wud b "sleeping in the car". gle ah!!n shrey told me "to pray to God".coz i'm getting panicked..hahaha..bagos btol!!but we're lucky again coz we managed to reach the gas station on time..fuuuuuuuhhh..lege! :) n now looking forward to play bowling tomorrow!hehe

i think i fall in luv again

2010-02-24T20:25:00.000-08:00

i dunno y, but dat figure keeps on catching my eyes today.most of the time during the class was spent by staring at him.i was more attracted to look at him, than looking at the screen.n i dunno y, but i'll be smiling whenever i see his face.n afta da class, i was hoping badly, to bump into him so dat he can "tegur" me..siap set time agk2 bole kluar class same2 x.. shooott!!kenape mesti 'dup dap dup dap'?? gosh, he was just behind me n i have no guts to call him. walking down da hallway, he was later at the front, but rushing for something... man, he din see me ke??gle downn!! but da thing is, i know him during the skating party.he was actually da one who started da conversation.he said that he's in my chem class.i always see him around,but never get da chance to know him.we had fun together,as if we've known each other before.siap ajak race lagi tho at dat time was my first time of skating.amek kau, tergolek-golek jugak atas rink tu!haha..starting from that moment, i think he has something that attracts me.but the worse part is, we never ask names.bersembang bagai nk rak, without knowing who is dat person.coz da 1st question dat i asked him was:"hey, whre are u from??" gle salah strategy. nxt time, 1st question shud be name ok??haish..But today, i really wanna know his name.man, i can't stop smiling when i think of "how desperately i wanna know his name".. haha.. gelak sorg2 je..or mayb ANGAU! i tot i couldn get the chance today, but miracle always happen.when i stop thinking about him, he suddenly "muncul".when i was walking down the staircase, he was just behind me!wah, peluang bagos!!n yeah, finally,,the momnt that i've been waiting for..i talked to him, a conversation that can make me smile till now.n i got to know why he was rushing, n he din see me earlier..heh,,i'm pretty sure he'll tegur if seeing me around..ngahaha..adoyhhh.. gle CAER laa..asl la ur face sweet sgt..haiya..n now i know his name!!caya la!!i think he can be my "pengubat luke". *tersengih-sengih sorg2*eh, lupe nk tanye: "are u on facebook??" yg mcm dlm vday muvee tuu..ngahahaha..sengal~~

p/s:jgn amek serious with this post.saje suke-suke.It's impossible to get him coz he's not a muslim :( tp ajk kluar dating boleh x?? boleh kotttt!!hahahaha :))

an update, i guess

2010-02-22T21:19:00.000-08:00

man, i've been staring on the screen for like hours, not knowing things that i should write. i gave myself one month to start thinking of a "new" life. I guess one month is not enough, but let's "PRETEND" that I'm OK now. For some reasons, I wish that person never exist in my life, coz i find it harder each day, struggling with the new path, without realizing things that I've been doing.Things seem to b tough, n i never felt this way, giving up so easily in my studies, n nothing seems to look good for me.I'm such a loser for this term, n I need to buck up for the coming terms.I tried so hard to make myself happy,keeping myself busy at all times, n I guess I can have myself back one day.but only time will decide, no matter how long does it take, days, months, or maybe years. I'll wait for that day, coz I'm desperately need "myself" back!!reading week is over, but i think i had a "good" break with my friends.mayb i should include something in this post that will decsribe my "reading week".*at least*
muvees~valentine's day n dear john.both are awesome, but dear john gave more impacts on me.

Dear john,

No matter how many years does it take,

I will always wait for u,

Coz i know even though we are far apart,

We can still have n look at the same moon,

n the only thing that I know is I'LL SEE U SOON THEN

it's somewhat portraying my current feelings, n it made my cry somehow,for some parts, but the worse is when john is reading his note to his dad. gosh, that was so sincere,n i miss my abah damn much!! :((

i did so many things with my friends over the weekends, but weekdays, i tend to spend time at home, sleeping of course n watching muvees n not to forget, ccoking.OMG, I eat a lot!stress+makan! gemok daaa~ but that's what we called as the real break.hehe. weekends were wisely used, n FYI, i din spend a single penny on clothings, or simply called shopping!!*tabik spring sme diri sndirik* i had two skating parties, with the international students, for outdoor n indoor rinks.

snowboarding @Table Mountain n then CNY dinner @Mandarin

nnt dh financially stable, nk beli snobod laa~~hehe

squash n badminton at da same time * qada' workout 2 weeks :)*

skating party#2 n broom ball

this game is awesome!!like manyak2!haha

kick it or dig it!!somehow it's easier to play the game like soccer! ngeng~~~

n evryone used gud "tricks" since many people were confused with their own teammates!lol

"man, gimme the ball badly!!" Go Fara!bak kate Raj! but I can't beat Vinay, the defender

n dat's da end of my first reading week in canada! got to start studying, i mean, to FOCUS more coz i've been "playing around" for the last few weeks.but still, looking forward for the next trip to table mountain. i can b a "trip organizer" back home, but not in Saskatoon.haha.jgn suro sy jadi manager ye kwn2..so funny la korg~~More friends as time passes, n I'm doing good here.I guess. :))

It's O.V.E.R!!!

2010-01-22T21:19:00.000-08:00

it's over between us, coz finally i have da strength to ask for da answer.I dun want da same thing dat happened to my fren happens to me coz it will hurt me more."Let me know when u're free.we need to talk.important".with only one call, evrything is cleared.he feels better to b single,n if this is for our own benefits, i'll accept it.But if it's because of someone else, I won't forgive u.But hey, i'm not dat cruel, I've forgiven u coz for me, u're a nice person. I'm not going to revenge..Stop saying SORRY to me coz it hurts me more. *If SORRY is enough, why do they create Laws n police in this world??* owh, i love this line, it's from my current fav Korean drama, "Boys before Flowers". Geum Jan Di n Gu Jun Pyo sanggup tggu for each other for 4 years, n I think I wud do da same thing. But how about u?will u wait for me?? I've told u dat I h8 to b dumped by a guy,coz it hurts me more. literally, u dumped me coz u r da one who made dat decision.But u told me dat I'm da one who left u coz I decided to chase my dream n flew off to Canada.I know, we had a hard time since then, but I tried so hard to make both of us happy.we've gone through everything, but it's just dat u can't stand it anymore. I let u go bcause I loved u, n I just want u to b happy.I hope we can still be bestfrenz like wut we used to b, before we jumped into da "fantasy world". dat's y i called u back, coz i dun wanna end it like s**t. we started with smilesss, n we shud end it with a smile, at least. Thanks for everything.. I'm sorry because I yelled at u. "senang eh u ckp??u mmg dh lupe all ur promises n hopes??kenape senang sgt u ckp mcm ni???Arrgggggggggggghhhhhhh!!!"It's not easy for me to accept da fact dat u've changed..U admit dat u changed a lot but u know me,aite?I'm da one yg ssh sgt nk terime kenyataan. I feel weak, lifeless, n only Allah knows how I feel. cdeyh mcm mase xdpt fly aritu.u know exactly how I was during dat period, aite?? It's not easy to get rid of u.U left me with memories dat will never fade.I lost my Sony fon, which means I lost most of da pictures when we were togeda.Mayb Allah wants me to forget them. but how could i throw away my beloved kookoo bcause u asked me to bring it here. if i knew it earlier, I shud just left it for my niece. n how could I throw my glasses coz dats da only one I got.n how could I throw away da swatch, Hush puppies shoes, adidas,"i believe in happy ending" tshirt, n da couple tshirt??coz I brought them all!! n do I have to change my passwords because they are all related to u!!!i know u did da same thing, but if u wanna get rid of me, go ahead!! change ur password!u know wut, da thing dat can still make me smile is to see ur smiling pictures.i can still remember how i forced u to *senyum nmpk gigi taw!*.. n I'm happy to see ur latest pics with dat kind of smile..n da irony is, we decided to b togeda on da 22nd april 2008.n we broke up on 22nd jan 2010. 22 is my fav number but not anymore I think. things always happen between us on da 22nd, aite?i dunno y, but it just happened.coincidence je, n we din realise act.

i dun believe in happy ending anymore..seriously i dunno how to thank u for the smiles that u've created on my face. I dun think i can have those smiles again n find someone dat will treat me like u, coz u're da only one dat can act "tahan" with me. have a blast with ur new life.we'll get through diz, but like i said, i'll hate u if u did diz for someone else.coz u said dat u wanna b single, not to have da burden anymore. thanx for da freedom dat u just gv me, n i hope u can njoy urs as well. I'm going to hate da entire keturunan of species G if i found out dat u did this for the 3rd party.I've had enough, for now, i just want to close my heart, *tutop rapat2 n lock it well*. GUYS out there, dun make me fall in luv with u, ok??coz I'm going to kick ur a** if u dare to do so.

"klu jd besfrenz, bole jelez x? can I still share my probs with u? can u still call n text me? n can we still go for a date??"owh, i know it sounds stupid, but I just can't help it..it sounds desperate somehow, n i think I was so prideless..but hey, I'll move forward.I'll try to study well, n I'll try to b happy, ok?? time kaseh daun keladi!

K.E.C.E.W.A

2010-01-21T19:22:00.000-08:00

yes, i'm totally K.E.C.E.W.A. kecewa with this one person. Let's call him as "P".n I feel sorry for my gudfren, n let's just call her "R". they were together since f4 but their relationship ended somewhere in 2008 or mayb in 2009. we used to hangout togeda, double dates, n sometimes even triple dates!old times always the best la! the thing is, both of them were not happy afta they broke up..to me la kan, nape la one of them pndi2 minx clash! afta quite some time, P wanted to b togeda again, but R refused because she needed some time to think about it. of course la kan.dh kne dump, then sdap2 je minx nk couple balek. xke ssh tu nk buat decision??but obviously deep down in R's heart, she wanted to b togeda again. But then, P never asked again, n he din contact or even pick up the calls n reply the messages from R. hey, common la. BUKAK MATE besar2, n realise that R is waiting for u. She never stop waiting!!! because of all ur promises n hopes, she even rejected other guys!! n do u know how does it feel when u find out dat da person u're waiting for is actually with someone else??? I know I'm just a fren, but it hurts me when i got to know diz.I can't imagine if I'm in R's place. considering the things dat P have told me bfore, which is like *not to think of a new relationship, more focus on study, got no time to play around, etc* I can say that P is such a jerk!! I can't imagine what wud I say if I meet P in da future. sori bro, but for now I h8 u so much. I treat u as my gud fren, but u hurt my bestfren, so I don't think I can treat u like old times. because u're not only cheating R, bt me as well!! I was damn shocked when R told me about this, I can't even breathe, n i'm super SAD, DISSAPPOINTED, n I dunno how to express my feelings here.I cried a lot when I was talking to R.n of course R cried more than me. I can't continue doing my assignments in the library, n my fren, Julia asked me to cool down coz I was so angry. gosh, lots of bad words came out because of this thing. n I went to da gym, so that I can actually forget about this, but it's not easy hey. seriously I can't imagine wut if the same thing happens to me coz I can see da possibilities. R told me to get ready n not to wait till I get hurt. But if da same thing happens to me, I wud swear dat I'm not going to look for someone who is in species G!! owh, I wish to b in Malaysia rite now. I need to HUG u babe!! b strong R. n for P, berbahagie la dgn teman baru. not to b mean, but u're even worse from the other fren! I'm terkilan with u, n for some reasons, i hate u for being part of R n my life.

*i had a terrible day yesterday, today is not dat gud as well, but working out in da gym makes me feel better. n I can't wait to play squash with Thomas tomorrow..owh, I need to make myself busy so that I won't think of anything dat will only sadden me*

Fun n games nite

2010-01-18T18:49:00.000-08:00

A friend from the Buddy program invited me to the Fun n Games nite.n thre was a potluck as well. i decided to make some begedil.heh, lupe how to make them, so i e-mailed my siblings. N kluar la mcm2 recipe, including my bro showing his cooking skills when he was in UK!not bad la.but i think my 1st attempt to make begedil is kinda dissappointing.but anyhow, i still have to bring them for the Fun nite.it's actually for the Christmas camp reunion as well. I didn't go to da camp but da good thing is i could still make some frens. Owh, i love making new frens.. Most of them were from China but i got to know the Mongolians, Indians n Iranians as well. N this one Mongolian lady asked me to come for da Bible reading every Friday. "Erk, do i have to come?coz I'm a muslim, n I dont think it's a good idea"..siyesly i dunno how to actually tolak dat invitation. But she said that i can just come to know more people n make some frens. Herm, i'll think about it. (dalam hati: hari jumaat ktorg ade halaqah la. Xkn nk pegi bible reading plak?haish..)
But da best part was the game! Some of us chose to play da table games.My new frens, melissa n Gina taught me how to play SPOON.. *grab da spoon once u got 4cards of the same number*. gle kecoh la.xcited at first, but later i asked them to play something else in the gym.but the guys have already used it for soccer.

soccer,anyone can join in, including dat lil boy, but no girls were playing.i wanted to join in, but obviously segaann!!haha

We're among the supporters!!

But hey, i played basketball! Xpenah2 dibuat, but i asked Melissa to join in as well.*muke x brape nk malu* haha..i didn't really play basketball back home, so i dont know da rules. Maen blasah je, but it was awesome! Tho the girls were only me n Melissa, but the guys were all supportive. *wa caer maen dgn howt guys bro!* i was wearing boots, n melissa was wearing sandals. Smart gle kan ktorang??tergolek mmg byk kali la.licin kottt..but still, we played a nice game.konon la..at first i knew none of them, but we can still play as teammates. We got to know each other after the game ended.ngahaha..owh, i can't wait to see them again! *mode gatai dtg balek* haha.. But it's just for fun! I'm happy coz i'm getting more frens as time passes. :))

of "K"

2010-01-15T12:06:00.000-08:00

I do have a gud fren.or mayb used to b a gud fren.Let's just address him/her as "K" so dat it won't b dat obvious.At 1st, we decided to b gudfrens, but after a while, it turned out to be "superbestfrens". Our 'friendship' was good, n we're happy with that, but not until last December. we used to text each other everyday, n talked through phone, skype or sometimes ym. But we would prefer phone beacuse K's problematic Celcom broadband wud only cause a fight.I can still remember that K used to hate to go online n even facebooking!owh, I tried to understand that. We had a tough time after my final exam is over. It's just a small fight, I guess,but it changed everyhting!!I tried to talk to my other fren, looking for a solution that should make sense to me. If I was considered to be such an ego person, I can actually get rid of the 'ego' if that's the only choice I have. I wanted to b like what we used to be, but sacrificing my ego was just a waste. K decided that we can't be like old times n it's even more frustrating to find out that K is doing things that he/she actually "pantang-sgt" to do. I know we can't be as good as we used to be, but replying my messages with "not-so-called-a-good-reply" is not acceptable! and ignoring my messages is even worse!!do u know how much terkilan i am when i saw ur updates in fb??i tot u h8 fb sooo much!!I know that I still have an infinite number of frens, but it's just that I don't wanna lose such a 'gudfren'. yes2, u're my gudfren, n i always hope that it'll last forever.I luv my frens, n will always do.insyaallah...

p/s: If u think that u're K that I'm talking about, I'm sori if I'm being too harsh, but I just dunno how to say this to u, since u're like ignoring me nowadays.hmm..

i wanna watch Alvin n the Chipmunks 2, i want the chipmunks from Mcdonald's, i wanna add my collection of chipmunks..I WANT CHIPMUNKS badly!!! wuaraghhhhhh..

Aura bukit merbah, seremban

2010-01-08T22:50:00.001-08:00

08012003, tarikh keramat that has changed my entire life.dat morning, mak, abah, kmiza,abg sudin,kjehan n kanak2 sent me to this place.hati kate xnk, tp gagahkan jugak.. i got a CS(college sister).K.sha namenye. dat year, Petra Nabila agak famous because of SUKMA.n my family pon g tanye la mane PETRA NABILA? n my CS (suare agak demping sket), owh PET??ade td, xtaw kat mane dah. owh, batch name die PET?cool!
after evrything settled, family ckp nk balek.n to cover my sadness, i asked them to bring me out.nk beli pe yag patot.konon la.padahal sume barang dh complete kot!n as expected, i cried a lot when my family left. *I XPENAH RELA MASOK ASRAMA*. rutin harian, kol mak kalau bole evryday. xsah kalau x nanges. public fon jd my bestfren!visitors nk every week, n outing pon nk every week gak. n i always have my own OB (outing bermalam).suke2 je.alasan, homesick! slalu kuar masok bilik HEM, mase tu Datin Hjh Zuraidah. always be my kesayangan la!haha..untill one point, abah dtg,n i said, *ADIK NK QUIT!!*..last2 masok bilik pengetua(Pn. rokiah).pergh!!XJD QUIT tros!but i've told my abah, stay smpi form3 je eh.pastu x nk dh dok cni.my family pon mengiyekan la. KONON! tup2, stay gak smpi f5!haha

dining hall dear, i miss ur breakfast, lunch,tea, dinner n supper, especially WAHI!!kat cni je bole jumpe kot!

i miss diz suasane as well..but i'm not sure whether i shud miss the moment when i was a junior, (f1 n f2 esp)
*fork n spoon slalu hilang sbb seniors suke pinjam n slalu suro parents pos fork n spoon. xbole ckp2 or borak2 with juniors yg laen, n then tgn x bole atas meja, x bole stare seniors, nnt afta mkn kne panggil. n xbole tdo, but juniors mesti la slalu tdo an, dh name pon xleh wat pape kat table..* tp mase dh seniors mmg heaven la an, nk memekak satu table pon bole, gossips apetah lg. juniors jgn dgr plssss!!pantang gitu!!haha..
owh yeah, dining hall ade 2 bhgn. da 1st one, yg ade hi-table is called HOLLYWOOD n da one yg dekat ngan food counter, SETINGGAN. from f1-f5, mmg dok HOLLYWOOD je babe!mase f5 mmg btol2 depan hi-table!pergh!standard tggi gak la tu!.*konon*.tp slalu je kne serang ngan wardens yg xbrape nk puas ati tu!haha.but then, mase ramadhan, ade changes la plak! xpasal2 kne duduk SETINGGAN??omgosh!! dh nk habes baru turon standard g duduk situ?naseb baek x lame!tp best gak, slalu bole dpt food extra, n nk curi2 mkn awl mase hi-table dinner pon bole.xbrape nk kantoi!hahaha.

rindu makan ikan keli masak cili hijau.favourite tu!mkn hari2 pun xpe. mase juniors slalu dtg kantin, bukan sbb kaye tp slalu kne suro bli food.seniors mmg pemalas nk jln g kantin. tp yg best, slalu dpt upah.haha. ble dh senior pun, i did da same thing.mase dh f5 esp.nk study konon.from AR1, jerit pggl jun2 kat ats.n not to forget, blanje dorunk skali.fair enough, kn??

mase BADA.aktiviti agame.i'm a naqibah, hi com plak tu.so kne la bg contoh yg baek.tp x brape nk baek gak. slalu borak kot mase BADA. xpon, tertdo.hahaa.

ade maksud tersirat byk gle for dis pic. AWAS!!.tp dh berkubur kot.ramai dh *slamat*..yg stay, bagos la..

ini kwn2 bola sy.kami berempat support MU, except ateng, Chelsea. mmg slalu kne condemn la. go ManU!
when i went to Moscow, i got some sort like miniature for them. i couldnt find ManU, so I just bought AC Milan.evrybody got a miniature of different players n sizes.n for myself, i hold for KAKA, da biggest one!obviously la kan! hehe

for now, I miss Bukit Merbah a lot, n I can still feel da aura.siyes, x tpu!
junior or senior, both give memories that will never fade..
zaman buli-membuli, cintan-cintun, starter-marter, kutuk-mengutuk, gossipssss, naek rooftop, stay up for performances, date dgn starters, blablablabla...n they will always remain as memories.

i'll come back to u, TKC! will always luv u.

*keep the flag flying up high*

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1st week of school

2010-01-08T17:32:00.000-08:00

new term has started,

results for first term are not as expected, because i had a *very high expectation*

but at least i did better than in ICPU :))

alhamdulillah..

n now let's start with my 1st week of school

bajet kobar nk mampos tho i did register for hard classes as well as yg merapu(kot la)

monday: ponteng sbb br nk balek saskatoon since tickets are sold out

tuesday: math110 lab at 8.30am. terpakse ponteng sbb x mampu nk bangun,

n plus, it's only math placement test, doesn't count nways.

n followed by phy117,n obviously it turned out well

because i'm taking it with Dr Robinson again! such a superb lect!

same classroom, n i chose to sit at da same place

da dfferent is, Taylor who used to seat next to me is no longer there

owh, n i met my dear fren, JULIA!!i'm glad that we're still classm8s

in da evening, i went to my boss's house, to meet the kids!!

i miss 'em so much n they're happy to see me as well. (dh lame kot x jumpe!)

n at nite was Anthro class, where i met Miss Fikar's clone!hahaha

she is so like miss fikar, craps all da way, but da good thing is she has notes on slides

wednesday: the day whre I met most of my frens, coincidentally..

surprised to see Kat coz i tot she's already transferred to Calgary

but she's still here n we're still classm8s for Phy.

(n she asked me to sit with her in da middle??.erk, i muke dok blakang la)

i met Taylor at da hallway, n he's happy dat he passed his Phy diz time (i'm glad for him)

Kenneth n Shane at the tunnel, n a lot more. no need to mention i guess

another nite class, History, just a small one..(ade ke org nk blaja history sgt?)

we're required to use wiki n some discussions have been done

i'm happy to get a lot of responses by the other students since they know that i'm not a local

n i got to know dat *saskatoon pun ade bowling gak!*

siap ade ajak g maen skali, haha... alrite bebeh!

thursday: one class JER!which is phy, tp x pegi sbb overslept!oops!

but at least i still go to school later n managed to get new U-pass n acces kits

friday: Chem n Math110, n i started doing all the assignments n some revisions

*dh xmau tangguh2 keje*

blackboard, webassign, wiki n masteringchemistry will be my good frens now

instead of facebook n my own blog..

overall, this term will be way2 tougher

5classes n 4labs

they're all interesting (smpi xtaw nk drop mane satu..haha) but require a lot of work

but this will obviously teach me to b a better person!

pray for me people!! :)))

End of da 1st winter break

2010-01-04T21:37:00.001-08:00

Ticket balek saskatoon abes,
Which means i ponteng my 1st day of class in 2nd term.
Such a bad start,huh?
But now i'm safely arrived at my "kampong".
Edmonton slamat ditinggalkan,
Wut a wonderful time i had thre for more than 2 weeks..
Thanx everyone in Edmonton, especially Ainaa n Maryam for da stay..

*jage my toboggan baek2, ok?*

Now have to start focus on studies,
Need to make myself busy in order to get rid of him..
I cried a lot diz morning since i've got to know the answer that i've been waiting for..
So, Buku baru for 2010.
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..

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insufficient funds

2010-01-02T23:01:00.000-08:00

last day of shopping,,

we went to South Common

where all da factory outlets are located.

OMG!!!

i'm totally broke diz time

i can't swipe my card anymore

n when i went to withdraw an amount of money,

it said: *insufficient funds*

ok,, dat's a sign to STOP shopping!

but sgt puassss hati coz,,,

i got a GUESS handbag for a very good deal!

n some other stuffs yg boleh consider as berbaloi

sgt suke ati, but at da same time,

sgt CUAK to start a new term

TAKOOOOOOOOOOTT!!

Saskatoon is calling me now

slamat tinggal Edmonton

nnt dh kaye balek, I'll come again..

hahahhahah

*i'm so glad dat i"m not studying in UofA*

or else, i won't have enough money to balek malaysia

thousands of dollar have been spent in Edmonton

hari2 maw shopppppping je kowt!!

n here some pics for last day out

lunch @ Mikado restaurant

dh lame x mkn sushi

xde keje @ future shop

i guess, diz is like da end of my first winter break in Canada..

satisified, had so much fun, tho duit byk dh habessss!

so balek saskatoon, i shudn't spend on clothes, or any stuffs yg merapu

no more shopping, but have to start saving

sbb nk bli tix balek MALAYSIAAAA!!!

dh rindu malaysia, dh homesick balek!!

new year celebration

2010-01-01T23:20:00.000-08:00

Before going for the countdown, we had a potluck @ one of da senior's house. Ainaa, Maryam, Bebe n me masak cekodok pisang n kek tapak kuda.haha. ank2 dare terlebih rajin. n afta dat, we played charade n mafia. that was awesome. i laughed a lot, sgt byk, sgt terok,smpi tergolek-golek mainly because of these two persons but not to mention here.

afta da countdown, we went lepaking @ the city hall since there's a lot of people taking the public transport.so we took some group pictures. n otw back, there's a drunk man who was about to attack me n Ainaa. OMG!i was so scared ok? his face was damn scary, n berhingus. yuckyy!!but luckily, the boys looked back, n one of them saved us.fuuh. what a relief!n the boys sempat takut2 kn us as in what if the drunk man suddenly kluarkan pisau n stab us?uishh..i can't imagine dat! tu la padahnye minum arak, kn?i'm so glad to b a muslim. :))))

*pls excuse our ke'demping'an for the first few seconds* :))

Galaxyland

2009-12-31T01:01:00.001-08:00

*TWINK*

warming up

finally, I could try bumper car!

space twister

pirate ship

loooooopsss!!

loops that could compress ur head n u'll feel like a tortoise

but we can still smile in front of da camera. cayalah!

peace for da cameraaaaa!

4 dare pingitan

*happy faces*

had so much fun, peninga pale, saket tengkuk bcause of da loops. t was awesome, yet a brutal one. But i'll surely try it again!besssssst sgt! herm, at da same time, it reminds me of Genting trips with my frens...rindu korang la!

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Snowboarding??

2009-12-27T20:49:00.001-08:00

Excited, n I tot it wasn't dat hard!

Tersungkur, tergolek, terbaring,,

Lenguh+saket tgn, lutut n tuuut,

Berlanggar, berlage, more than 3 times..

But hey, I'm not giving up!!

Coz I'm pretty sure dat I cn get da skills one sweet day..

N I will definitely go for snowboarding again..

Smilessssss..;))))

*dh berduit nnt nk bli snowboard la.haha*

Practice lg, ok??

Muke pnat n xlarat

Some of da beginners yg d trained by 'instructors' (which r actually some seniors of UofA)

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Boxing day attack!!!

2009-12-26T22:55:00.001-08:00

One word,

SATISFACTION

Guess, GAP, fcuk,Nine West, Abercrombie&Fitch, The North Face, Esprit, Calvin Klein,

U're mine nowwww!!

low prices, long q, lenguh kaki, rambang mate, duet habesss,

But I'm totally satisfied!!

BIG Smilesssss :))))

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toboggan @ whitemud park!

2009-12-23T18:43:00.000-08:00

we got our toboggans @ Canadian Tire last nite

n today, we went to Whitemud Park!

excitedddddddddddd sbb 1st time!haha

*eh2, nape xde org? r u sure diz park bole gune for sliding??

mmg gle la kte, bas driver pun pelik to drop us here..

hahahhahah

gle x gle!

xkesaaaahhh la. alang2 dh smpi maen jela pape yg patut, an?*

bercanda di tepian pantai..eh silap, snow!

dh lame2, kaki beku dowh..

mase ni xjumpe slope lg, tp dh excited maen..haha

n jln punye jln, we finally found da slope!

owh gembirenye hati!

gosh, kaki tangan beku!!!!

*excuse me, cn we get into ur car?just for a while coz our hands n feet are freezing rite now*

(muke xmalu+tebal, minx tumpang kete org sbb dh xthn sgt.hahha)

n afta dat..

bajet expert jap..

tp before dat minx tlg gak sorg bdk ni

he told me where shud i start

nk flat je ke nk bumpy?

of course la nk flat2 dlu, kn?

tp criuzly, da slope is sooooo gud!

snow masoooooooookk mulut!!

nxt time kne pakai mask or lilit2 tudung

xtahan, tp sgt besssssssttttt!!

but have to surrender awl sbb sejuk sgttttttttt!!

bkn sjuk sgt pun, tp kaki dh beku smpi xlrt nk jln!

nxt time, gotta dress well

new boots are essential!

paling pntg, we din spend a single penny!!

betape jimat n behave nye kami hari ini. ;)

Penaaaattt!!

2009-12-21T21:19:00.001-08:00

5th day of hols
Sy sudah penaaaattt!!
Bcause I walked a lot, merayau-rayau
Dgn Edmonton yg sgt tebal with snow
Shopping smpi x igt dunie, but still brjaye xbli brg mhl2 sgt

I got this Esprit dress dgn hrge yg murah
*sgt puas ati*
But then need to surender awl fr today's shopping
Coz I'm damn tired!!
Y???
I stay up tgk Korean drama yg ade org pnah suro tgk
Which I think kinda ridiculous!!
I need to get rid of him
But I watched da drama for like hourssssss
mlm smpi tghari da next day
I finished 25 episodes in 2days
It was a good drama, xrugi tgk!
But now, I need to fix my sleeping time
Must be back to normal again!!
Or else, i will b like today,
Pnat, n jln dh x betol which causes me to stop shopping earlier
Alahai~~
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i loveeeeeeeeeee hols!

2009-12-19T21:45:00.000-08:00

i love hols so much!!

y????

sbb dpt bgn lmbt,

no need to pg skola,

n bole jalan2 n shopping puas2

nk g mane cuti ni??

EDMONTON je..

(sbb xde duit nk naek flight g tmpt laen)

but siyesly naek bas for 5hours in canada is a good idea.

saket pinggang kot, x mcm malaysia punye bas! ;(

shopping @ west Ed mall

(da largest mall in North America)

dh xmaw g sane slalu coz bole bankrap kaw2 la..

so i'll just wait for boxing dayyyy!!!!

n yeah, i like my new jacket!!

thanx to Ainaa yg brjaye hasut i to buy diz Guess jacket

which is actually on sale..(mmg murah gle la..puas ati!!)

n here is miss ainaa yg kuat makan!!

owh..da *flirt cupcakes* were damn nice!!

i'm gonna spend 2 weeks in Edmonton

n i'm looking forward for a lot more

*in a way trying to make myself happy*

bcause da *problem* is still bugging me!!

I h8 u!!

2009-12-15T20:49:00.000-08:00

U created smilessss on my face
But u let tears to roll down on my cheek
I put my hopes n dreams on u
But u screwed it up!!
If this is not going well, we shud decide on something..
For now, I hate u so much!
N u'll b da main reason if I screw up my last paper tomorrow!!
Sorry, but I really mean it diz time.dun txt me coz I off my phone. ;(

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MSD dinner

2009-12-06T20:38:00.001-08:00

Dinner at Hilton Hotel
It was soooo much fun!!
Pn Zalilah is damn friendly, as well as her husband
So much gelak ketawe..
Criuzly I laughed a lot
Without realizing dat my first final exam is less than 12hours from now!!
Ok, enough for dat!
Gotta study
n I shud b worried on how to wake up early tomorrow since Aziza has left for Mexico.
Pray for me people!!
I need to get up early, n not to miss da bus!
Or I'll b l8 for da 9am paper..
"Ya Allah, ya tuhanku,
Kurniakanlah ku ketenangan dn kemudahan utk mjawab soalan peperiksaan yg bermula pd esok hari"
Amin ya rabbal alamin..

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exam mood

2009-12-03T13:25:00.000-08:00

ssh sgt..

pning pale, ngantok, lpr,,,

tp gagahkn jugak

nggak maw dean's list ka??

klu maw,

STRUGGLE ye CIK FARAW!!!

Pe pandang-pandang??

2009-11-28T00:42:00.001-08:00

It's eid people!!!!

N I'm stucked in saskatoon!

Solat raye in a school since not enough space in masjid

If Malaysia, tmpt pompuan sume putih, tp cni colorful plak!

Khutbah raye but get distracted by kids

Nape ade lmbg pas sesat kt situ?haha

Terserempk with my ank2 murid as well

sempt pose jap with Dalal. I'm wearing kbaye ok??haha

wif my housemate, Aziza

Afta solat, my frenz dropped me at the campus

coz I need to hand in my assignmnts, phy.

G claz kjap la.dlm 15 mnts je sbb dh lewat sgt.n mamat yg slalu dok 1row with me pki kopiah.

Ok, die Muslim rupenye.tbe2 rse nk wish raye, skali die plak wish dlu.haha.

Afta claz, lepak with Julia!!

julia is a Sudanese n she's damn nice

"Today is ur Eid, u shud njoy urself!"

n she helped me a lot today, including settling my fido account

we had gud time together

n she likes my kebaye soooo much

n i think i shud get her one later coz she's being a gud fren to me

n i just realized, mat2 salleh sume pndg me dgn agk pelik

"pe pandang-pandang??"

i nmpk cntik ke pelik??hahahha

if ainaa n afyqah were here, we wud simply say: "SLAMAT ARI RAYE"

like wut we did during da last eid in edmonton..haha

Julia n me

at nite, another "eid celebration"

Dalal, Aziza, Ghina n me went to a Muslim restaurant

lots are muslims are there

but the thing is, women n men are separated??

like they can't eat together??

nape plik sgt??ssh la nk mkn wif family, kn?haish

Ghina x suke amek gambr.agk pelik bcoz i think she's soooo hot!!

dtg lmbt, so dishes for buffet tgl sket je..

xkesah, jnji dpt mkn..n tmbh 2x kot nasi

tho pg raye mkn subway je.. =(

rendang, ketupat, lemang, xde pon!!!!

kenyang jugak,,,alhamdulillah..

afta dinner, we watched new moon!!

tp aziza x join sbb ade byk keje

n in canada, seat kre 1st come 1st serve

which is sape masok cinema dlu, boleh plih seat

ktorg lmbt, so kne dudok dpn2 tu ha

mak oi!! edward n jacob dpn mate je ok??

pening tgk!tp jnji had fun!

n otw back, fmily kol

i know they're damn busy coz my sister is getting married today!!!
ble ckp ngan mak, both of us nanges

tho mase tu mak sebok tgh lyn tetamu

rindu mak!rindu abah!rindu family!!!!

adik xde kat sane, tp adk pki kbaye yg supposenye pki mase knduri taw!!!

evryone here tried their hard to make me happy during da eid

coz they know how sad am i having eid that is waaaaaay different from backhome

i feel so grateful to have u guys around

tq sooooooooooo much!

slamat hari raye everyone!!!

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cm mane ni??

2009-11-24T21:40:00.000-08:00

smlm final quiz for geog la

agk struggle for da whole weekend

smpi sggup bli txt book tho dh agk lambt

but still, teramat la haaaaaaaampehh!!

i think, i screwed it up!!

cdeyh nk mampos coz i need to do better diz time

n today, final lab test for bio 120

my fav lab kot

for da last minute preparation,

i had Q&A sessions with Jett

she's so smart that she studied every single thing, even da simplest ones

da discussion was awesome, n i think i'm prepared!

but for some reasons, i din get all the right answers

it's frustrating when u really hope dat u cn get full marks

i'm so desperate for marks, ok??

n i shuld b studying for da nxt final lab test, bio 121

which is way way harder

owh puhlliiiiiiizzzzzz!

i need to get gud marks

n i have to spend like 10hours per day like wut all da geniuses in my class do

Mitch spends 10hrs/day to study

n he got 82 for da midterm (he's 1of 5 students who got A for midterm)

n i'm just wondering, how the student with a score of 90 study???

pinjam otak kejap boleyh?

I envy u, ok???

2009-11-18T22:53:00.001-08:00

Hey u,

A few weeks ago, u told me dat u've given up of doing medicine,

U screwed up ur 1st test badly, din u?

But then u got ur booster again n u did pretty well on ur 2nd test,aite?

U worked hard for dat one n even harder for da 3rd one.

U even ignored me sometimes but I had to understand.

*terpakse d situ*

n yet, ur sacrifice or mayb my scrifce as well is paid with ur xtraordinary grade!

What?? U got A* for da 3rd test?

Pe A* tu?

DISTINCTION!

Omgosh!!dat was extremely good,ok??

Guys klu struggle mmg result gempak eh??

*sdikit tidakpuas ati d situ*

I envy u, ok???

U told me dat u envy me, but da fact is I'm da one who has to be jealous!!

I nk gempak2 gak!

then, sdpkn ati:

u, org dpt fullmark for last lab test bio 120.

*tp xde la gempak mcm distinction for a test in medical school, kn?*

it's ok.tape2.. *sdapkan ati lg*

Then, today dpt balek phy lab, where Holly nanges sbb xthn wif LC at dat time.

I did well in diz one which boost up my mark drastically.

But then, ade xtra warning plak written on da paper

besor2 plak tu..haish

Xpe, at least xfail mcm 1st lab. Sile bersyukur, ok?

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One day with kids

2009-11-15T19:56:00.001-08:00

Hi!what's ur name??

I'm ur new teacher

I'll help u with ur homework.

"ok, let's go to our room"

Aman Ali, y u didn't do this part?

"owh, how could this happen to me?? I know this one, it's easy!"

*papela, action plak mamat ni*

"n can't u see my spiky hair? It's nice, isn't it??n don't touch it!"

*yola2..I know u're charming*

da other kid, fatima

"teacher, cn u play Barbie dolls with me? We can play at my room"

*what??my zmn Barbie doll dh berakhir ok??so funny la bdk ni*

next, abu baker.but he's so sensitive.kuat majuk.

"I'm a good runner n I'm sure I cn beat u"

Haha.dat is so funny. Obviously I cn easily win da race.u'll lose

"no, I'm not!I'll challenge u coz I'm a fast runner!"

*berlagaknye bdk.obviously I cn challenge him*

n yet, ble kalah majuk.

Abez hlg macho

N da last one, baby eshal

"baby, don't u think dat u're pretty?"

She smiled n angguk!

*chett!xleh blah.nsb baek mmg btol2 cantek!haha*

criuzly I had sooo much fun with them.they remind me of my nephews n nieces.

"teacher, cn u stay with us??"

No darling, I've to go back.

"then, when r u coming back?can u come tomorrow?"

Sori, but I've to go to school n study. Whenever I'm free I'll come to see u, ok??

N otw back, sume org berebut nk duduk with me.haha. U guys r sooo cute

abu baker n eshal

-fatima n aman ali

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rindu :(

2009-11-14T17:54:00.000-08:00

rindu rumah ni
rindu org2 kat dlm ni

rindu malaysia

rindu everyone

rindu everythg

"duit ktorg xluak pon,

bonus pun xabez gune lg

pelik la nape duit berlebih-lebih ni

n ktorg siap nk pg holiday byk2 tempat lg"

*saket mate tgk emails from abg2 n akak2*

ok, i know what does it mean

xpe, nxt year dlm 3bulan mesti korg rase duit korang luak sket or byk tros!

coz ur " top kaki paw" is coming back!!

hahahhaha

-u guys gv me da title, don't u?-

nk details untk bank account??

boleh sgt2

rmi2 masokkn duit lg bagos!

*berangan*

criuzly, can't wait for summer break!!

x sbr nk paw korg!!

xsbr nk g holiday rmi2 lg

*dalam pale dh pk mcm2 plan, nk wat list brg utk dipaw*

hahahahahhhhaah

Happy bufday abby

2009-11-12T21:58:00.000-08:00

Hey u,
U left me for quite some time
But I know u din forget me at all
N I do miss u sooo much
I've got storiessss to tell u
I got thingsss to share with u
I just can't wait to see u nxt year
N yeah, I'll gv ur blated prezzie
Happy bufday najwa albi abd hamid..
Finally u're 19.but I still wanna b ur lil sys..do wait for me,ok??

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i'm desperate

2009-11-10T20:25:00.000-08:00

nk dpt 80%

nk dpt perfect score for da left quizzes n tests

nk full marks for labs

nk dapat good marks for FINALS

nk sume perfect!!

*berangan, berangan n berangan*

happy bufday my dear badak

2009-11-09T19:09:00.000-08:00

sha syg,

"sweet 19,

a year older, a year wiser, a year sexier"

it's a typical wish, back in coll, aite?

i miz all the moments i had wif u

zmn TKC

homesick, homework, PRA-RA

rooftop, stay up

starters, jogging(tho i plg mls)

1st time lepak kat luar smpi midnite

ngarut2 psl lek, SHOPPING, berangan

afta TKC

genting, pangkor

SHOPPING, MUVEES, BOWLING, HANGOUTS

intec n taylor's

ole-ole, casa, summit, sunway, mapley

n just so u know,

i'm glad to have u as a friend, a gud one

thanx for always being my badak air bulat

coz i will always b ur cicak kobeng menggrutu

happy bufday,

norharisa husainy shamsaifful

p/s: sori, i cudnt find any old pics mase kt coll yg cantek.ade pun free hair. compare both pics.yg bwh waaayy better,aite?prove dat we're less bulat n mengrutu.haha

suke n bengang gak

2009-11-06T11:31:00.000-08:00

suke

berjaye bgn awl n manage to go to geog claz

(xtdo afta suboh, but still was rushing to catch da bus))

n then sbb ade org kate nk 09

n i make it as "09 smpi xyah tdo,taw!"

in geog claz,

(which i think dh lame heck x pegi)

tbe2 amek attendance arini

wut??attendance??

fuuuh, nseb baek g claz arini

n i sit nxt to diz one mat salleh (quite good looking..hu3)

mat, slalu ke amek attendance?

xla, ni baru 2nd time.jgn risau.

(in english of course!!)n he smiled at me!!*wink*

slalu gak dok seblah mamt ni

he used to agak rajin in taking notes

tp arini xamek notes lgsg??

n he was sleeping kjap, n afta dat maen game??

no wonder i tbe2 dgr org sebut "fcuk, fcuk" in da claz

kalah game rupenye

n i was eating subway's omelette(without ham of course!)

but then my perot tbe2 berbunyi??
gosh2!segan siot!

but suddenly i hear the same noise too

prot mat salleh seblah pun berbunyi!!hahha.lwk!

nxt, mase nk masok phy class

i was having a hard time to push d door (yg agak berat)

smpi ter"auw2" kat situ..haha

but suddenly ade sorg mat salleh ni

(macho n cute n pnah usha gak coz muke same mcm my chinese fren kat plkn)

die tolong pggkn da door for me, but at da same time, laugh at me!

siot je, tp nseb baek charming..(tercair la plak)hu3

afta phy class,i went to see my biol121 lecturer

to check da answers for midterm

da thing dat we know is thre's no such thing as diffrnt sets of midterm!!

sume org tertpu!!

coz we thought dat diffrnt colors of paper indicate dffrnt sets

so nobody will copy their neighbors!

rupe2nye sume paper sme je

gud trick huh prof mcloughlin??

bengang

ble ade org kate die nk tggu afta i abez claz br 09

tp org tu xtaw hlg ke mane, x 09!!

n I'm sooooo bengang bcause of dat!!!

coz dh ckup sbr for diz week

he's kinda diffrent recently ~~(which i h8 so much)~~

we din talk for quite a long time,

(smpi rase cm dh stahun xdgr bite)

msg pun dh jrg gle nk mati

coz we need time to study!!

(which is good for both of us)

i do appreciate all da prepaids dat he gv me

since he doesnt want me to spend more on paying bills

but still, i'm mad!!

coz he's so confdnt dat we can make it today!

(ur confidnce doesnt make a promise)

when we hav a fight, da best solution is to hav a TALK!!

difference in time is a big problem to us!

if "U" read diz, i really mean it diz time!

~~go awy from my life if u want to :(~~

midterm grades

2009-11-04T20:52:00.000-08:00

herm, i'm happy!!

really?? i dun think so!!!

here goes my midterm grades:~

let's start with biol 120

i think i spent a lot of time on diz subject

(1st paper n da only one for dat week)

i've read da notes for a few rounds,

i feel good when i do da exam

i thot i'll b fine n can score well

but unfortunately, i got 74%

(feel bad coz i expected to get at least 80%)

da class average is kinda low

as a result, evryone got xtra 4 mark

which means i was initially scored only 70%!!

gosh!!xtra2 work is needed!!

next, biol 121

herm, i din expect much from da test

bcuse i cud feel how terrible i did

not only da exam, but da hall as well

was giving me a pressure!

i dunno y evryone has to b squeezed in to da same hall

sempit heck!!!panas jer!!

there are 80 MCQs

n it's kinda "exhausted' to answer da questions

n i think xde org pun sempat meniru kot

sempit n pnat!!argghh

n da result is as bad as i tot

224 students in da class but only 5 students got 80 n above

me???

of course not in da list!!

65% jerh!!

rmi kot fail, n yeah, it is a hard class!!

(but da highest score is 95%!!i wish i cud lend his/her brain for a while)

lots n lots of memorizing

kalah sejarah!!haha

but no xcuses plz!! work harder, ok?!!!

GEOG is da worst one

dh la minx postpone sbb clash ngan phy (patutnye xboleh kot, tp wat muke ksian..haha)

n dat wuz my last paper

n still xboleh score tho i got enough time to study

WHY???

1st, slalu ponteng class, so notes x complete since lecturer x post notes

(class plg awl, n bgn awl is a big prob.xsah klu xlari kejar bas for diz claz)

2nd, xde duit nk bli text book so x ckup materials nk bace

3rd, x work hard kot coz njoy je over da weekend (last paper katekn)

akibatnye: dpt 62% jer! jer!

padan muke!!!!

but phy makes me happy

i used to h8 phy, like hell

bt da lecturer is niccceeee!!

dri dlu smpi skrg all my phy lecturers n teachers are damn goooood!!(alhamdulillah..)

i worked hard for phy.(bias sket)

n siap book study room in library n study with Julia

i'm quite cnfident with all da preparations before da test

but then, i tot i screwed it up

coz it wasn't easy as i expected

i finished it just on time, tho da questions look sooo simple

but they're not actually

alhamdulillah...

i felt so happy when i saw "good" written on my test paper

i got 84%

i was extremely happy tho i shudnt

hellloooo..u're not da best faraw!!!

there are geniusses in ur class with a score of 98%

puhhllliiisss!!!jgn ujub n riyak boleh x??
weng!!

ok2, nxt is archaeology

rite afta da test i met my lecturer n told her dat i need help

coz i think i screwed up my test again

n yeah, she told me to get notes from da class note taker

"i kept on telling myself dat i will fail da test"

coz i've no confidence at all

but my frenz told me not to think negative,but wish for good things

i keep on praying n allah knows da best

Allah gives me strength to accept any possibilities

n alhamdulillah, it's not as bad as i tot

i din fail da test, but i got even better than geog

which is 70%

(btol2 on da class average..haha)

overall: my midterm grades xde la bagos sgt, mmg xbagos pon!!

faaaaarrrr away than my target

but it's better to start from bawah, kn??
if ok sgt, cnfrm dh mls nk berusaha afta dat!

it's ok faraw!u can do better!!!

(self'-motivation is essential)

no more -ve thoughts

2009-11-03T20:58:00.000-08:00

nite lab is not as bad as i tot

i enjoy all my nite labs, specifically biol 120

i had difficult times with da microscope

but da passion in biology overcame evrything

I LUV BIO sooooo much!!

i tried my best in diz lab

i even stayed back, though the session has actually ended

n just to finish da whole lab, including da exercises

i dun wanna screw up diz lab

coz wut's da point of being passionate in it, but u can't score well??

dat's y i need to work xtra hard!!

i'm kinda do well in this lab early on

for da first lab test i lost only 1 mark

"but, langit x selalunye cerah, aite?"

n for da 2nd test i lost 4.5 marks.

herm, i can smell "my zaman kejatuhan" there

coz i think i screwed up my 3rd test!!

wuaarggh!!

dat's my BIG problem!!

negative thinking!!

owh, plz go away, u, negative thoughts!!

janna, a fren from geog lab was mad at me for being a negative thinker

"u shudnt be thnking dat way before u even know da results"

yeah, i know.. n i will try my best

coz it's not only for bio,

but i feel d same thing for all subjects

especially archaeology

which i think i screwed it up, again n again!!

argghh!!

midtermss, plz b nice to me

i have to score well

halloween nite??not for us

2009-11-01T18:32:00.000-08:00

they wear their "freak" costumes during halloween nite

but not us!!

haha..surprisingly, i wore kebaye for da 2nd time in canada

why??

coz we want to celebr8 my housemate's graduation!

"am i look weird?"

aziza: no!!u look soo cute cute!

u look like a malaysian now!

haha..am i??

wtv it is, but we just wanna have fun!

da only thing missing is da make up!

i'm da only one who din put anythg!

hahaha

so we went to a restaurant, THE GRANARY

it reminds me of Malaysia

coz, there's an old SINGER sewing machine,

exactyly da same like my aunt's

adoyh..tbe2 la plak homesick

n the girls' crazyness remind me of my frenz!!

gosh!!rindu korg!

they r extremely crazy!!!
unbelievable coz they seem to b da polite ones.

hahah..but dat nite revealed evrything.

unfortunately i dun have any pics to prove their crazyness

but these shud b enough to show who they are

ghina, rima, dalal n my housemate, aziza

it's a gud thing to know them

tho sometimes i felt so left out since i dun speak arabic

though they r Somali, Lebanese, Tunisian n Sudani,

but they're all speak Arabic

n indeed, sing arabic!!

when all of them memekak in da car, singing arabic,

i cud just laugh, but not to sing along!

owh, tbe2 rindu ustazah jeriah

nk blaja Arab lg! gosh!!

I MIZ EVERYTHING!!!

it's not easy, isn't it??

2009-10-29T21:00:00.000-07:00

when i screwed up ICPU

i've learnt a BIG lesson

n dat's y i'm here

to start a new life

a very new page

to find myself

to learn what does life mean

n wut are da survival skills

but i realize dat LIFE IS NOT EASY

challenges come in between

n ALLAH knows what's best for u n for me

when u expect things to be good

but they turn out to b da other way round,

u wud think dat u're such a BIG LOSER!!!

there are gud reasons behind all these

n its only U,

only U that will decide

what n how u should deal with them

~~~~~~

I want people to have faith in me

i'm not a loser forever

i decided to do what i think will b gud for me

my aim in this university is to get excellent results

DISTINCTION, specifically

n da first thing is to get an average of 80% for da first year

so dat JPA will trust me again

i know that distinction is waaaay harder to achieve

but it's not wrong to aim for dat, aite?

this building will be significant for my whole life

i really hope that i can have my parents n da whole family to be here

FOR MY GRADUATION

but diz time with BBIIIGGG SMILES

full of satisfaction

taking pictures, hugs n kisses in front of diz building

but will it be possible???

the hopes that i have r really killing me

coz it's not easy, isn't it??

dat was awesome!!

2009-10-28T17:08:00.000-07:00

it's all about my "beloved" phy lab

i wud usually be frustrated by now but indeed today's lab is totally differnt!!

WHY??

the lab coordinator is still "bad"

but diz time my lab partner made a huge diffrnce!

LC: u're not supposed to do it this way n u shud b doing blablabla...,,

Holly: can u plz don't talk to me like dat, like I'm a STUPID???

and her tears started to roll down

WOW!!wut a big surprise!!

i din expect dat she cud burst out and cried in front of me n even da TA??

gosh! she seems to b strong n happy go lucky person

yeah, but i know she cudnt just stand it anymore

i wuz unhappy as well for being treated like a stupid person

coz we're still in da process of learning, aite??

we do need help n dat's y we ask questions

but da gud thing is..

the TA n LC treat us better after dat

the TA is usually being nice to us but diz time he is even nicer

as well as da LC

n for da first time we managed to complete everything!!

da whole thing for da first time!

can u imagine dat??

we failed our first lab, (extremely terrible)

getting a better mark for 2nd lab (but still not a gud one)

n now we really hope dat we can get EXCELLENT mark for da next lab

dat we had today

the best thing is when da TA said:

"everything looks gud to me"

FOR DA 1ST TIME

WOW!!dat was awesome

bcause all diz while we just heard like

"these figures dont look gud to me" or mayb "u better do it again coz diz is totally out"

I'm so grateful today

alhamdulillah..

both of us happy

da thing is,

NO PAIN, NO GAIN

her tears made a huge diffrence

but we made it coz we tried to b strong!!
thanx Holly!!

i've told her to cry more to get gud marks.

hahahahha

we cn b gud frenz nway

nk duit!nk duit!!

2009-10-26T21:42:00.000-07:00

"ur account has been suspended coz u've exceeded ur credit limit"

wut da tuuuut???
owh, i shud become the fan of:

"stop ROGERS n FIDO from screwing Canada"

dammit..

i've taken loads of plan which i think wud be convenient for me

but indeed diz kinda money- grabbing thingy is killing me

I'm broke n I dun have money to pay da bill!!

i've paid da one dat appears on the fido store's screen

n my account is still not being activated

WHY????

i kept on going to da fido store

n kept on calling the customer service

but i'll always get differnt informations from them

fed up nk mampos lyn mnde2 alah ni

Arrrrghhhh!!!

it's all about da money

no matter how hard u save da money

dat wudn't b enough to survive in diz country

nk duiT!!nk DUIT!!

is thre anyone yg baek hati wants to give me some money??

JPAku syg, masokkn la duit cpat2

need to reactivate my phone account ASAP

or maybe org2 kat m'sia baek hati nk top upkn my mlysian numbr??

ANYONE????

GUD things to start with

2009-10-16T11:47:00.000-07:00

diz morning mak kol

BESSSSSTTTTTT sgt2..

k.jehan buat open house so rmi ade kat her house
mak tanye adk sehat x??

of course la i jwb sehat..hahaha

then i ckp, mak nnt pos brg makan kat adk byk2..

n here goes the list:

nk rempah ratus, cube tomyam, sub bunjut

nk sardin packet nk blablablabla...
mak ckp berat la nnt

tp i ckp xpela mak, sket2 pun xpe sbb nk save duit, xnk spend on food byk2

sbb duit dh abez byr duit umah..

OOOPPPPSS!!

scare x sengaje i started to tell her my probs~~

mak, duit dh abez sbb byr duit umah,

adk pindah umah baru sbb xnk duduk ngan membe laki

n sewe situ mhl, dats y pindah

n akibatnye xpsl2 dh rugi cad1100 ats angin cmtu je

tp plg xpuas ati ble slalu kne maki hamun ngan landlord lame tu

sedeyh sgt, huk3.

study cmne plak? ok?

em, mule2 aritu x ok sgt sbb byk sgt probs

byk bnde kne pk, hal umah lg, mmg xstable, study pun xbrape nk ok

tp skrg dh ok dh, dh bleh score ok sket

mak ckp adk jgn maen2 dh..ni la dugaan namenye

SABAR jela.duit boleh dicari, jgn risau,k..

wuargh..sdeyh2, pg2 dh nanges,

but diz is like my booster for da day!!
It's a gud start nway~~

but then, i'm alreday late for da claz at dat time

n yeah, i was rushing for the bus, but a few seconds means a lot!!
i missed the bus for like how many times i cnt remember..hahaha

n as usual, i had to walk

but Friday is full of barakah..

suddenly Sara and Mike who might see me walking by the road, called me n gave me a ride..

wooo..thank god!!everything seems good till now

BUT MAYBE NOT FOR TONITE

coz da old landlord is going to see me n yeah, he's da "spoiler" of my life ere

i'm broke!!!

2009-10-15T17:27:00.000-07:00

this really tests my "survival skill"
duit dh tggl sket
jpa msok lmbt lg
cmne nk survive
owh, i'm BROKE!!
this is all bcause of dat stupid lease!!
omg!!if i knew it earlier, i'd rather stay at da hotel
da only thing dat makes me happy is of da studies
it's getting better~~~
more FOCUS coz i dun wanna think of da problems dat i have
just let others say whatever they want
i have to b strong, n remember da objective of being here
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
nk masok dean's list
nk dpt DISTINCTION (aim high sket..haha)
nk prove to everyone dat i'm a biotech ppl!
not mdcine or even engineering
owh.. I LUUVVVV BIOOO!!
others plz go way from me!
xmaw2!nk bio related je.haha

sy xbodo, lembap sket je

2009-09-30T21:35:00.000-07:00

group B, Rm112, bench 11
partner: Holly, a very nice girl
lab coordinator (LC):ntah sape
TA: mamat yg agak baek
malang #1
LC: please hand in ur paper rite now, before da lab starts,
hand it now or not to hand it.
em, sir, can i hand it a bit later?
LC: hand it now or not to hand it.
WTF!!shoot..ckp la elok2 sket..n yeah, i din hand in da paper..
siot2!!nsb baek ade sorg mamat yg sme2 sengal gak. x anta.haha
malang#2
LC:these angles dont look good to me. it's better if u turn around da paper n do it again.
afta tracing all the dots n redraw the lines..
sir, we got da same angles.
LC:owh, i think dat's da only thing dat we can have.so, just use da angles.
WTF!! same je, bengong..buang mase ktorg je. (Holly n me agak bwat mke)
malang #3
analysis part:blank, xtaw how to start.
ngarut2, pe mnde ni..
tanye partner pun blur2 gak at 1st.
Holly: i dun wanna ask him. he scares me.
owh, me either.we shud ask another guy then.
when we have no choice, we hv to ask da strict LC.
sir, what are we supposed to do for this part?
LC:just follow the instructions. it's all there.
em, ok..(ckp leklok sket la.i lembap sket tp x bodo. so mmg kne tanye byk kali ye)
hampeh glo, lembap nk mampos wat mnde alah ni. only for 6 questions but every part has to follow about 7-8 steps. leceh gle nk mati.
malang#4
MALANG TERAMAT since we cudnt finished da whole lab!
LC: please write ur conculsion, u have a few minutes left.
OMG!!nk tulis pe ni..
Holly:ok, i think this part we cannot do it together. it has to be different n no plagiarism.
yeah, sure.
at the very last minute, struggle gle abezkan conclusion n source of error..
tulisan burok nk mampos n da LC x abez2 kasi ktorg pressure..menyampah gle.
x kasi muke langsong!!dammit! nk minx file pun nk mrh2. xyah la nk punctual sgt2.
skema!haish..sume org x puas ati!1st lab kot. kasi la muke sket.adoyh la.
I SCREWED UP MY !ST PHY LAB!!
nsb baek my partner jenis yg ok2 sket. boleh masok la. 2x5 je.haha. thanx holly!

p/s: WTF= wut da fish, instead of f***k

suke duke raye 09

2009-09-24T15:34:00.000-07:00

SUKE...
pg raye dh lwk
bgn lambt, suboh gajah..trok gle
then mndi2 n for da 1st time xde sape suro iron bju pg2 raye
hahah..sape la iron bju org kat kampong since i'm not there
i bet evryone iron sndri2 kot..
then g solat raye wif afyqah @ riversideview lounge kot
otw mmg sjuk gle smpi rase cm nk pki telekung je..haha
while da rye feast starts at 1
otw to da feast..
everyone looked mcm makcik2
bawak makanan then jerit2 when da wind comes
n wish "slamat ari raye" to those yg asyik usha our baju raye yg cantek tu! haha
during da feast..
OMG!!!byk gle makanan! gosh2
kampong saskatoon i xde mnde2 ni..
n mmg sapan sume la smpi xlrt nk bgn dh..
ade rendang, sate yg sdap, n mcm2 nasi
nasi lemak pun ade n not to forget nasi aym made by amar n da gang

with da girls

duit raye from amar?? (owh..bersebab tu)

selamat tinggal from mereka.. thanx evryone!!

DUKE..
xdpt nk solat raye kat masjid
xdpt duit raye by hand
tp naseb baek dpt duit raye in advanced (plg byk kot diz year)
cdeyh xdpt nk salam mak n abah

xdpt nk g ziarah kubur
xdpt nk beraye wif sdare mare
xdpt nk maen bunge api n mercun
plg sdeyh ble sume org bz beraye kat kampong
smpi xde mase to kol me..
cdeyh gle coz i've been waiting for da kol mcm org bodo je
n yeah! i miz everyone..
sempat kol n ym kejap je
internet kat kampong prob gle..

CONCLUSION:
raye kat canada obviously x sebagos kat m'sia
but 1 thing to be proud of is I din cry during da 1st hari raye..
yay!berjaye thn!
but not at diz moment since everythg comes at da same time
(wut a big dugaan!)

malam raye

2009-09-20T02:00:00.000-07:00

kami masak
i just join them actually
ade ainaa, afyqah, flora, amira n guru..
masak smbl dgr lagu raye..
hahaha..
best gle snce aura raye dh start terase
n yup, we're done with da nasi briyani n rendang ayam tonite
we'll continue tomorrow with sate goreng n kuah kacang.
owh, rendang ayam is not dat tasty since byk mnde xcomplete.
da attempt to make da rendang is kinda failed!!haha
xtaw la cmne esok..telan jela yek!
n tonite evryone is so crazy with skype
especially for those who r currently in canada n not to forget in malaysia
kcoh gle, sume xcited nk raye
yg kat m'sia plak sume sebok2 tunjuk duit raye. adoyh la
n we have lagu raye marathon inside da room
sume gle nk balek raye, but cant do anythg
hanye boleh menyanyi dn meratapi kesedihan shj
xsedar suare sipi2 cm katak sket, sume nyanyi x igt dunie
karaoke free katekn, n nk lwn party yg mat2 salleh wat tonite.haha
takbir raye plak berkumandang di laptop
sayu mndengarnye..
nk balek Malaysia!!huk3..
but come on la,,namae pun merantau
but it's a gud thing dat we can share all da tears n laughter togeda
tonite i tdo at ainaa's room, as well as flora
tdo rmi2, cm kat kampong ble rmi org balek
owh, miz those moments of tdo berhimpi-himpit.haha
tp ssh gle nk tdo tonite
tbe2 teringat kat family..
y they dont call me?
i wanna talk to them
especially mak n abah
i'm waiting for da call coz i miz them sgt2
malaysia dh raye, dorunk sume dh beraye
dh slm2, minx maaf ngan sume org, g kubur, visit sdare sume
but i've been left, all alone..
owh, cpt la raye..
xsbr nk bergembira, not bersedih!
wish for gud thing tomorrow!

raye di perantauan

2009-09-19T09:55:00.000-07:00

ooohh balek kampong..
ooooh balek kampung..
hati riang..
lalalalala..
btw, diz year xbole nyanyi lagu ni..
coz i'm studying in kampong SASKATOON
but then i'm gonna celebr8 da EID in bandar EDMONTON..
hhahahaa
diz is totally da opposite way..
it's frustrating not to have da eid in my own hometown
wah..rindunye lalu jln jem kat highway PLUS ble nk balek kampong
n ere, going to edmonton by flight.
mane nk jem nye..haish..
n yup, i dun wanna b sad during hari raye
it's for u to have FUN!
chill la..nme pun berade d perantauan..
so it's worth it to spend money on flight
Lots of frenz are in U of A..
cn feel like Malaysia too..(hope so)
n yeah, bole survey west ed mall!
owh..gembirenye..haha
n last nite , afta iftar in campus,
i went to Saskatoon mosque
Lots of muslims were thre n I had to squeeze in to pray..
cm lwk gle, tp sronok..tho i'm da only one yg bertelekung..hah
meriah sgt last nite
the girls are making da henna thingy
n i did too
my new fren, saleema made a beautiful henna on my palm.
thanx saleema!
it's going to b a nice celebration in Saskatoon too
since I knew many people already..
lots of new frenz, including makcik2..
menarik2..haha
tp xpela, nxt2 year raye saskatoon kot.haha
n tbe2 rindu fmily..
mak, abah, sume..cdeyh2..
bertahan la fara oi!
u asked for it
nk fly sgt,kn?
PADAN MUKE xdpt raye ngan family!
kakak2 n abg2ku skalian,
sile la bg duit raye aka top up untk adk ye.

SASKATOON shines

2009-09-15T09:45:00.000-07:00

i'm currently in a place called saskatoon
or my frenz like to call it SAS+cartoon
it's kinda a rural area
but trust me, it's a good place to study!
it's quiet, peaceful, lower cost of living,
less distractions, less entertainmnt, n less etc
y??
owh.come on!
it's kampung!but not dat kampong act
it's not as bad as i thought
to me, it's just like IPOH
there are malls, but not many
they are all scattered, n not too big
but diz will teach me something..
not to be a big SPENDER anymore
yeah..i'm kinda surprised tho
coz when i 1st time went to MIDTOWN PLAZA (da largest mall)
i felt kinda heartless to buy anything
not like when i wuz in malaysia
i wud simply grab anything n spend da money
tambah2 lg ble tgh kaye..haha
but not ere, coz u wud only spend ur money during BOXING DAY
dat's wut i've been waiting for
m not gonna spend my whole allowance ere
but will do it in EDMONTON coz they hv da largest mall in north america
sounds gud, huh?
owh..plz2..sbr2..study dlu,n winter break g serbu EDMONTON MALL
hahahahahah(will save money then)
bout da weather, it's kinda chilly
now is in summer..
it's sunny, but da wind is chilly
they said da winter is bad, da wind act
u're gonna like it in da beginning but l8er u'll seriously hate it
i dunno coz i'm so excited to hv da winter here..hu3
another fact is, there are only 2 major seasons here
summer n winter
coz spring n autumn are very short
n there are no maple tress in saskatoon!
it's a fact,tho
it's kinda dissapointing coz u're in canada, but u cnt hav da maple leaves
hahaha.such a waste..
n to me, saskatoon is just like moscow
y??
coz a very beautiful river lies in da city
da buildings r nice
n kete cm xpower sgt, agak burok cm kat moscow..huhu
n there's also radisson hotel
da place dat i used to stay in moscow
owh..wut a coincidence!
feel like going to moscow again..
shud save money then..
back to saskatoon,
frankly speaking, it's a gud place to study.
n yeah, i shud b showing u pictures
but my phone's camera is not working
i din bring my camera
n i havnt got my iphone yet
sori for dat, but i'll show u some later on..
wish me luck ere!

frenz r 3F

2009-09-01T22:29:00.001-07:00

for me, frenz r 3F

what is 3F???

3F stands for food, fmly, n freedom..

frenz are like food that can provide us with energy,strength n health

they can b spicy, sweet, salty n sour

n same goes to frenz

they can b spicy, salty n sour when they hurt u

(scientifically these kinds of food cn cause stomach ulcer-ref to my kadok project)

but they cn b sweet when they talk gud things, comfort u whn u need 'water',

n provide u with a lining of protection

frenz r fmily too..

y??

i treat my frenz like my own fmily

i luv to spend time wif 'em

n sometimes i prioritized 'em compred to my own fmly

to me, frenz r important (as well as fmily)

coz wif frenz we cn talk about many things

we can share laughters, tears n evrythg

(except for sharing da same straw or spoon..only fmly is allowed!hehe)

freedom also applies to frenz

coz u cn hv da freedom to do anything u want

since frenz dun hve da rights to prohibit u

n it is u to t8 care of urself

frenz r ur biggest influence

n dat's y u hv to choose gud frenz!

talking bout frenz,

m getting more frenz day by day

new place, new frenz..

but da best bonds will remain

no matter how strong da challenge is

but i realize dat m getting further from my close frenz

they said i've missed a lot of things..

yes, i noe dat!!

i feel bad for evry moment dat i've missed but there's nothing i cn do about dat

i've to struggle wif my own fate

catching up wif da route dat i need to follow

n appreciating people around me is not EASY!

i hurt people but i also get hurt either

m sori if i fail to be ur gud frenz or even juz frenz

m not PERFECT but i'll try my best to b ur frenz

i luv my frenz sgt..sgt syg..

cnnot describe it ere..

LUV is not to be shown, but to be felt!

oh tidak

2009-08-11T20:39:00.000-07:00

otw to pocket C..

awl lg kot nk wat medical check up

dpn pocket c

nmpk x org tu kuarkn pe?

huda, cuak x?

org cuak ni..

takut seyh nk ambek darah

huda: org pun.ahak!

xlme kemdian..

huda, saket x?

sssakit, saket la gak..

gosh2.ni wat takut ni

jgn jerit sudah, mlu seyh...rmi org ni..

ouchh!!saket2..huk3..nyesal2!!

xnk ambek drh dh..minx2 ni plg last

td pun dh ckup malu, nsb baek ade huda.haish

while waiting for da bus..

huda, tgk bdk tu..

lg trok drpd kte kot!!

haahha..mnjerit n siap kne pgg smbil nanges2 lg..

hahahahahaha

ooops!!t'gelakkn org laen plak!

(bangge sbb x sterok tu n dgr cte ade bdk pengsan mse ambek darah.haha)

ble jp tbe2 bg fly..

mcu lg?shoooot!!

xkn nk ambek drh n wt xray again??
adoyai..abez la drh den, n cell2 dlm bdn ni..haish

mse xckup, so t'pkse 'b'sdekah' d prvte hosptl

twin towers mdcl cntre..

n of course mengajak sum1 to tmn..

n si die dpakse utk ponteng claz ptg smate2 utk tmn sy..haha

cuak yg teramat, pg la juga wat 2nd mcu

mse ambek drh, mmg mrayu suro org tu wat jgn saket sgt..

bce bismillah n terjerit la gak!

mane x nye, mamat yg cucuk tu pun cm t'agak2.

dh la b4 tu psycho2 kate saket..haish

mak oi, slh cucuk kg cnfrm sket gle ni..

argghh..saket..saket..

taubat2..xnk wat mcu dh..

ni mke sure kne jd last one

tp...

langit xslalunye indh

for visa pun kne wat mcu lg..

coz canadians are very strict

huk3.

cn u imgne 3mdcl check ups within one mnth??

bks mntoux yg lme pun ade lg, tp kne wt 3rd mcu dh..

haish..duit abez, darah pun abez..

xyah nk don8 drh dh..

3x xray??

uish..xtaw la pe nk jd..

minx2 djauhkn dr perkare yg x diigini

doakan sy ye..heh

miracle happens for a reason

2009-08-10T02:23:00.000-07:00

they said:
buang jela harapan tu jauh2..
coz it will only harm u..
i said:
da smallest or even da tiniest hope won't let me down
dat's wut i learnt from my experiences
it always happen
n another thing,
no pain, no gain
nothing will come without effort, scrifices n prayers
i've gone through lots of things
my prayers r answered
they gve me da 2nd chnce
wut a surprise!!
Allah always knows da best
giving up is not da solution
medic n biotech sound good, but a big NO to engin
TRONOH n TORONTO are waaaay different
they cant b da same
as well as UK n UKM
there's nothng dat i cn do when others plan my future
including putting me into mdcine area again..
(mcm dh ludah jilat balek, kot..haha)
finally, i just told myself:
take a risk!!
juz ignore wut others say..
n always follow my heart
coz i always trust my instinct.
n yeah, I'm BACK ppl!!!
afta a long time..
n i wont ignore u again!haha

durian+rambutan=ketenangan (sket la)

2009-07-07T06:45:00.000-07:00

owh hari2 yg sdeyh
cpt2 la hlg dr idup ni..
dh xthn dh
n kilos dat i've gained b4 hve lost
gle ssh nk gain weight n even to maintain
"asal dh kering cm tengkorak idup ni",
kate mereka.
gosh!!burok seyh..
tp nk wt cmne
hati n perasaan mmg ssh nk cntrol
dlu kat tkc, if tension
mulut cnfirm x stop mengunyah
siang mlm pggl junjun minx bli burger or anything kt kantin
fuuuh!!gle rindu nk mkn cm tu
tp now ni nk mkn pun xde mood
tp..
nsb baek kt perak tgh musim buah
yay!!
pg ptg melntak buah
durian+rambutan
kepuasan sgt!!
durian especially..
mkn smpi xigt dunie n afta dat kepanasan
hahahhaha
tp xpe, asal ati senang sket
n another thing is tdo puas2
bgun nk dkt tgh ari afta suboh
melantak buah+tdo puas2=gain weight
yay!dat's da aim..
rse cm dh back to normal(tho still underweight)
hahaha..at least xnmpk tengkorak sgt
sdkit bahagie skrg..
still 'building up' da happiness
insyaallah..

sori ppl!!

2009-06-30T23:41:00.000-07:00

it's almost a month

dat i dun write anythg ere

i've gone through d hardest momnt in my life

n m sure most of u know bout it

it's not dat m running away from u guys

but i juz dun hav da strength to meet n even talk to u guys

sori for not replying ur messages

n not picking up ur calls..

i do need some time to accept all these

m still struggling for my future

later, m gonna reach u ppl!

dun wori..

i juz need some time

n for those yg trase wif me, sori hell2 ,ok

i'm not in da mood of doing anything sincerely..

m gonna b ok n mase yg akn tentukan..

dun wori bout me anymore

n m just gonna b fine..

thanx for all da support n ur worries

a big thnx to my fmly, my sengal n my luvly badak for always being thre

luv u all sooo much

sunway+bbq=satisfaction

2009-06-03T10:26:00.000-07:00

pg td bgn quite awl..

bcoz we have to marinate aym for bbq..

agk bidan terjun, n lack of many things

lead to a new "recipe"..

hahaha..cmpk2 je..

xtaw la sdp ke x..

n wut's next??

>>>>sunway lagoon!!

yay!it has been a long time x menapak d ctu.

gle xcited nk pg..

n 4 of us make it..

girls' outing of da day..

hani, wani dila n me..

we had so much fun thre..

terjun n lompat sne sni..n scream out loud..

y??coz kami sudah merdeka!!yahooo..

result?nnt cte la..heh

wristbands..abez duit byr deposit..haish

4 ank dare pingitan..

victoria falls je la..nk g niagra falls x cnfrm lg..haha

hujan yg turun..lalalala

gosh!!bajet howt..*kami mmg bgtu*

hahahhaha

had fun in sunway, tp kpntn teramat..

smpi xlrt nk jln..huk3..

ni sume sebab x ckup mkn..

x sbr nk g bbq!!

hahaha..

n yup, da nxt thg is BBQ>

d mne??

unit yg plg glamour smpi msok meetg JPA..haha

pnt+lpr yg melampau menguatkn dri utk x tdo tros..

nk mkn bbq cpt2, tho cuak takot xsdp..haha

n thank god, maen2 try n error pun mjdi gak recipe den..

agak sodap la..

tetamu???

xbrape nk rmi n xbrape nk sikit..

ok la, sesuai dgn food yg ade..

en. ammar mnunjukkn skill memasak..

(yg xbrape nk tere tu..hahhaha)

n see.. ktorg pun bleh msk wut..

antare tetamu yg hadir..yg laen missing in action..

bukti terhebat nape diz unit plg glamour mse JPA meetg..hahah

dan cik huda yg m'jadi bibik kami d mlm itu..

(gaji claim kt mr. president ye huda..hehe)

caye xcaye, jd gak bbq tu..

sori for anyone yg x d invite coz it's only a small one

nk ajk rmi2 tp tkut cm xckup n ssh..

btw, credit to sally n mr. presdnt coz sudi to make diz thg come true..

n to all yg join diz bbq..

m so hepi coz i cn still have fun with all frenz at diz moment..

at da very last moment as an ICPU student..

fly xfly, len kesah..

pe yg penting??

kejesame..haha

n relationships between frenz..

do keep in touch guys..

n thanx for being thre to colour my life..

luv u all..

spe still kaye??

2009-06-02T08:25:00.000-07:00

afta exam sure nk njoy..

ronggeng sne sni ngan membe2..

hangouts, shopping, muvees..

if nk listkn tmpt yg nk dvisit, brg utk dbli n muvee utk dtonton..

sure bermeter-meter pnjg list..

TP...

ade problem plg bsr, which is..

DUIT..

uish..berangan mmg mengalahkn ank mnteri..

tp purse dh kosong smcm je..

duit scholar???

xyah nk ckp la..

tggl brpe hengget je kat dlm CIMB bank tu..

ni sume sbb "terlebih baek" last sem.

sng2 je sdekah RM2000++ to pencuri..

diz sem punye duit, awl2 lg dh sapu..

dgn uni applications lg.

nk kate njoy, awl2 dlu la..

bls dndm bru nk merase abezkn duit scholar katekn..

at da end, ble ICPU dh abez,

xde duit nk njoy..

haish..kerugian2..

last2, parents jd mangse..

minx maap byk2 ye mak, abah..

terpakse, nk wat cmne..

tp siyes dowh..

spe pun duit scholar beribu-ribu lg kt dlm CIMB bank tu??

ade ke??

spe rse duit scholar die plg byk???

nk challenge??

hahahhaahahah..

it's getting more difficult

2009-05-28T21:14:00.000-07:00

asl ssh sgt??

xpenah dpt mne2 paper yg ssh gle cmtu..

until now, yesterday' s paper wuz da toughest one in my whole life

spm is waaaaaaaaaay easier

cm nk mati je jwb soklan physcs smalm..

not enough time to think

n even to answer all da questions!

byk gle blank answer

it's suxx!!saket teramat..

cmne nk fly ni??

dh la m'harap kat physcs je ni..

calculus mmg dh lme xleh m'hrp..

eng plak xtaw la..

dgn mr. ben yg t'amat la strict..

cn miracle still happen?

feel like giving up

tp tuhan xsuke org yg cpt berputus asa..

jgn give up, ok??

fight till da end..

tho it's getting more difficult

"kalau adk xleh fly, jgn sesape mrh,k??"

give me wings to fly

2009-05-25T01:12:00.000-07:00

final exam is juz around da corner..

am i prepared??
i dun think so..

i juz can hope for da miracle to happen..

with all da hardwork, stay up n all..

less sleep, n more study!

dat's da aim!

hope so..

n yes,

wif all da supports n prayers..

people!!!

i need ur support!

blek kg laz weekend wuz a good moment..

my parents r always thre for the support n prayers..

i need wings to fly..

can i have da wings, people??!!

i'm not dat strong rite now..

i dun need u to hurt me,

but i need u for the support!

dat's all!

si sengal

2009-04-30T10:15:00.000-07:00

name chipmunk ni kookoo...

tupai sy yg bg..

sy syg tupai sy..

tp die slalu sengal..

smlm team ARSENGAL die klh ngn my team, MAN U..

kepuasan hati sgt..ske2..hheh

dsebabkn team sengal die klh, die pun agak sengal arini..

si sengal sgt kuat jelez..

arini xpasl2 kne sound..huk3..

cdeyh2..

tp die try utk kurangkn kesengalan die..

tho sy yg cr psl arini..(kot la)

he admits his mistake

sbb die xnk sy sdeyh

n dat's y i luv si sengal..

no matter how sengal he is,

i'll try to take care of him..

insyaallah..

setahun yg indah

2009-04-22T04:13:00.000-07:00

dlu, ble ckp psl couple..
dorhh!!borink2..xde freedom!
n even dh nekad xkn couple smpi abez blaja..
mse kat tkc dlu, siap bet ngn room8, spe couple dlu..haha
tp berjaye thn smpi abez skola..
anti-couple!
tp...
ble dh abez skola, rse cm nk plak!
pelik2..n kbtulan ade si die yg mmnuhi syarat2..
huahua..xtaw nape..tercouple jua akhirnye..
n today, ckup stahun dh..
our 1st anniversary..
it has been a great moment with him..
i learned lots of things about guys..
@ girls' school, nothing much that we cn know bout guys..
we've gone through many things togeda..
ssh, sng,, everythg..
he's been a great supporter..
he's always there when i need him..
n now i think i've found my mr. perfect.
he's not perfect, but he's good enough for me..
i dun think i would dare to lose him
n find someone else..

no way!!insyaallah..heh
i really hope dat we cn have a happy ending..
but it's kinda frustrating
because people that make us to be at this point are no longer togeda
guys, i really hope dat all of us could have happy ending..
thanx for da good deed n pray for our happiness..
n to my mr. perfect, luv u soo much!ooops!

miz this moment..hope to have it again..

(with pyan n zan also)

thanx guys..heh

wish for a happy ending..amin..

bestest bufday~

2009-03-02T06:40:00.000-08:00

I do believe in happy ending.heh

19th bufday??

it might b the lst time to hv my bufday here as a teenager if I happen to go to Canada diz year..

n yet, it has been two years for not clebrating bufday with my bufdaymate, my own syster!!

then ,who shud I choose??

frenz or family?

i've given opportunity to choose, n guess who I chose??

FMLY!!baek x?haha

on saturday, my systa ajk g tgk muvee with her husband n 2 bdk nkl..

tgk muvee pe??GENG- upin ipin!!

haha..xleh blah gle, but criuzly, I had fun!!!

for a Malay animated muvee, I can give 8/10.

pecah prot tgk!!haha

at nite, counttdown for my bufday..

siyes cuak nk taw spe yg first person wish..haha

as expected, Topek was officially da 1st person yg wish coz it's sharp at 12..

tho rmi maen tpu wish minutes before through Ym, msg, etc..haha

i slept around 4a.m, not only melayan frenz yg kol, but also siapkn LAN assignment!

haha, xleh blah, bufday pun kne wat assignment..ish3

on Sunday, bgn awl coz kne tlg kat dapur..heh

most of da menu were my favourites..

laksa, pulut kuning,rojak buah,salsa,etc

n my favourite secret recipe cake!!-blueberry cheese-

m so hepi coz my sys allows me to choose da cake.Yay!!

but then, mase potong cake, ade ati dorunk suro i potong pulut kuning je..

kejam2!!they said nnt kat canada xde pulut kuning..haha

evrythg seems to go well, but I think da celebration is for my sys act.

her frenz keep on coming till nite but none of my frenz were there.

coz i expected dat it'll b only for my family..

the worst thing is my sys din send me back in the evening as wht she has promised..

gle sdeyh coz i wanna b with my frenz asap.

it was raining heavily, n i reached casa a bit late.

smpi sha pun xjd dtg!!huk3

n even topek tbe2 cancel ckp xjd dtg!!

bengot gle, siyes hampeh!!panas gle arhh!!

smpi casa, tros ngadu kat wani, ckp topek xdtg!!huk3..

nk nanges je rase but then evrthyng turned out to b da other way round.

i wanted to kol topek, nk curse+mrh sgt2!!

suddenly wani tarik g living room n guess wut???

TOPEK is in front of me, wif a bufday cake!!

GOSH!!gle hampeh, kne smpi mcm ni..

criuzly, I dun expect it at all~

t'kjut beruk la i ckp smpi xtaw nk ckp pe la.

ni sume keje Wani n Hani, my dear housemates..

n yet, i've da 2nd celebration with frenz..

diz time secrt recipe blueberry cake!!

glo arhh,, mkn blueberry cake je..yummy2!!haha

criuzly, mmg terharu gle arh, wif da gifts, stuffs..

topek gv me a swatch watch n adidas t-shirt..mmg pokai la die afta diz..haha

n hani gv me a frame, tp dh letak our pic,hhu.

farihin, choclte, sje nk gmokkn i

n wani, da surprise was da best gift i think..eheh

n to all, thanx for da wishes n evrythg that make myy bufday as da best at diz moment.

THANX a LOT!!

to my dear PHOENIX sisters, thanx for still remembering my bufday

special for sha n aness, korg at 1st mmg sengal gle..

nseb baek xlupe nk wish, but not having u around is waaay differnt!!

miss u guys a lot!!

n not to forget, my starters n juniors esp. yg struggle wish gune public fon..ahaha

n my wishes for da 19th bufday:

-nk gmok sket, xnk pimples dh(tho i rse cm b'tmbh je)

-nk jage my beloved ones baek2

-wanna b a better person, lg solehah, xtggl solat,nk pki bju yg decent sket..eheh

-lastly, nk study leklok!!xmaw maen2 dh..huk3

where's my badak??

2009-02-26T05:07:00.000-08:00

i'm not hepi right now..

everything seems to be wrong..

i feel sad now, my beloved ones are with me, but no all..

among all, i miz my best buddy, where now i found her to be my bestest buddy forever.

not having her around is like losing her forever..

criuzly, it's hard to have bestfrenz but it's easy to lose them..

i don wanna lose her, but we seem to be far away day by day..

i know she's so depressed rite now with studies n stuff, but i havent see her yet..

we shud have a girl-talk by now, as what we always do..

but now, we have it rarely..

i've lots of things to share with her, n also, i'm in a big DEPRESSION too..

i may feel better if i share my probs with her

I used to call her badak air bulat n she calls me cicak kobing menggerutu..

hahahahhhahhahah..

it's funny, aite??

the titles are based on our appearances during school time..

but now i juz call her badak coz she's getting slimmer n hotter..eheh

we keep on teasing each other n none of us hurt of that..

we shared happy moments together n gossips,etc..

we shared everythg, including our secrets..

our friendship is full of laughters n even tears..

criuzly, i miss every single moment with her,especially during school time..

we had a great moment in TKC n afta SPM life..

not only with her but also other frenz..

ANESS, BEE, NQ, CHETEN, n PHOENIXs!!

it's different here.

i can't find another badak, n she's da one n only..

no one can replace her!!

SHA, I MIZ U SOOO MUCH!!

i've lots n lots of things to tell u..

i don't wanna lose u, my dear..

i wish to have u around on my bufday..

huk3..cn it be possible?

THE SILVER LINING

raye ke?

ur just not up to my standard, gitu!

All is well iA

silence

Jodoh

:(

eotteohge?

mcm drama la plak!hehe

just bear with it :(

hello :) eh salam sounds better i guess

Say no to BF!

Heart attack!

my toon town friends are just awesome! :)

jgn pertikaikan please!

hello there!

'awesome' people

coz ure one of a kind

Trick-or-EAT, not trick-or-TREAT

C.O.N.F.U.S.E.D

hey awak!

what's our theme??

forgive n forget

anak-anak

unexpected

current passion

When the keys are not there

Terkejut mak, nyah!

ye kawan, i miss u too!

ko mmg kawan terhebat la!!

it was a blast!

will U wait for me??

Lepak

why do i stalk u??

*a walk to remember*

bile dh jumpe satu kepale

one word.RINDU.

i think he's the one!

saskatoon vs saskabush!

when "teen" is over

baru la bole action!! :)

i think i fall in luv again

an update, i guess

It's O.V.E.R!!!

K.E.C.E.W.A

Fun n games nite

of "K"

Aura bukit merbah, seremban

1st week of school

End of da 1st winter break

insufficient funds

new year celebration

Galaxyland

Snowboarding??

Boxing day attack!!!

toboggan @ whitemud park!

Penaaaattt!!

i loveeeeeeeeeee hols!

I h8 u!!

MSD dinner

exam mood

Pe pandang-pandang??

cm mane ni??

I envy u, ok???

One day with kids

rindu :(

Happy bufday abby

i'm desperate

happy bufday my dear badak

suke n bengang gak

midterm grades

no more -ve thoughts

halloween nite??not for us

it's not easy, isn't it??

dat was awesome!!

nk duit!nk duit!!

GUD things to start with

i'm broke!!!

sy xbodo, lembap sket je

suke duke raye 09

a walk to remember