Showing posts with label sad moment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sad moment. Show all posts

Monday, August 23, 2010

unexpected

"mak, mak, adk mimpi gigi patah malam td"
i was crying while telling my mom this, n if i'm not mistaken, it was last month.
we have this belief;
 whre having such dream means that thre will b someone close to us that gonna leave us forever.
i never thought that it'll b my own aunt, Rohani Zakaria a.k.a Makni.
she's the only my mom's siblings that i din get to see when i reached malaysia.
n i din even remember when was the last time i get to see her.
but i'm still glad that i could still see her for the very last time
i was in kl, with my other siblings n it was after sahur when i got the news.
ya allah, only He knows how i felt at that time
evryone was rushing to  Alor Star, Kedah, from all over Malaysia i guess
evryone speed up, n some even reached 180km/h, just not to miss the jenazah
alhamdulillah, evryone made it, n it was good to see Makni's face again.
she looks like my mom, n of course la coz she's her big sister,kan?
n at the same time i imagined what if that person is my mom??
i culdnt hold my tears evrytime i think about it, coz i think i'll never be ready to lose someone that i love
but Makni's face looks so cool, rase tenang je tengok.
n i even get to kiss her twice, before n after jenazah dimandikan.
muke org meninggal mmg lembut ke??muke Makni pon cm senyum je..
ouch, berair-air jugak kat situ, but they asked to wipe the tears before kissing jenazah
alhamdulillah, Makni looked so good, meninggal pon dlm keadaan beriman, insyaallah
the weather is nice during the funeral, n she's even lucky to die during ramadan
there's so much hikmah for her, with all the prayers from evryone.
she fell while taking wudhuk for solat zohor
she had a stroke attack, admitted to the hospital on friday, n she died on sunday.
it happened too fast, n nobody could expect anything.
Makni is the first one to die in my mom's family tho she's not the eldest
it was a big loss to us coz our silaturrahim is sooooo good.
we have our own 3R (Rohani, Rohana n Ramlah)
Makni's gone, n we only left with my mom n Mak Anjang.
thre will b no more 3R, no more "all the memekak stuffs", no more crazy jokes from  3 of them
we're gonna miss Makni, semoge rohnya dicucuri rahmat.amin
al-fatihah~




Thursday, January 15, 2009

am i stupid??

damn la..calculus at diz momnt is really stressfull. it's not bcoz of da subject itself but da teacher.. i can't help it la..ms foo seems to hate me..i dunno y..but i cn feel dat it started whn i askd her a question on da 1st day..i do undersatnd da question basically..but da way she taught made me scared n i can't gv da answer whn she asked..n 1 more thg i can't undrstnd is why she only aimed me tho thre were anothr 2 studnts wif me? x puas ati btol!!xpsl2 i kne hentam kaw2 la..2nd day pun kne lg..'YOU!!beautifully sitting at da back!!' i tot she aimed my fren at da back, but it turned out to be me!! haish..she tot dat i wrote nothg n only staring at her..owh plz la.. my paper dh pnuh tulis mcm2 at dat time..wtv la..bleh thn lg kot..but not today..fr da time being, today is da worst day for me(for calculs). we hv to show our hw to her..uish.gle sket ati la.. it's fine dat i did some mistakes. but, cn it b corrected in a proper way?? "AM I SOOO STUPID??" i know dat i'm not dat gud in math, n i dun evn like any kind of MAth at all!! owh..plz la.. i dun want it to b diz way..sumtimes i juz can't answr da questions bcoz she scolded me. not really bcoz i'm damn stupid..n xpyh la smpi nk pgg2 my telinge tho i'm "stupid" like she said..it's embarassing n criuzly hurt me mentally.. i'm in coll now, no longer school..n i shudn't b treated like a school kid..GIVE ME A CHANCE.. i dun want to study in fear..n even some of my classm8s realized dat she's kinda anti me..it's damn sad..i wud prefer last sem's classes.. all were damn nice..da teachers as well..i really hope i can adapt with da new environment.. n untill now i can't accept dat VONNY is no longer in Taylor's...i miz her like hell..huk3