Saturday, November 5, 2011

raye ke?

BUSY BUSY BUSY! oh wow i've been complaining for the past few weeks i believe. yes, school is getting busier, tougher, and annoying! lol i just felt like travelling and HAVE FUN out there. aigooo! studying on friday night is even worse, and yet people back home is busy preparing for the eid. nice gituuuuuu!! arghhh! I WANNA GO HOMEEEEE BADLY!!! glad that my family called when i was studying in the library? lol, good timing indeed! been busy back then that i couldnt have time to talk to my mom. difference in time is urrghh, annoying! everyone is home, not everyone coz some siblings have to go to their in laws'. but of course half of us is already 'macam nk pecah rumah'. big family indeed! i even asked my mom what should i cook for the eid? n seriously i jot down the recipe in my BMSC but the best part was when my mom showed me BAJU RAYE that she bought from her so-called Cik Kiah Bandung trip with my aunts and uncles. Seriously baju raye for next year? mak cakap 'adik balek malaysia baru ukur n hantar jahit acording to her new fashion style. haha seriously balek malaysia?! i wish i have that much money to go homeeeeeee! aigoo naseb baek tahan nanges though kne bahan with my own niece since my friends were around.  humm how i MISS THEM  badly right now. homesick gituuuu! :P

Monday, October 10, 2011

ur just not up to my standard, gitu!

malaysians loveeee drama!
arghhh stop pissing me off pls!
coz i'm boiling inside, seriously
when i reach the limit
u wouldnt see me as i am right now
aaarrghhhhh marah hell org yg tak paham bahase ni!!!
damn, i got my own so-called standard, whatver!
ok, that kind of person is not meant for TKC girls!
like seriously, i think none of my PHOENIX sisters can handle that person!
hahah overr gitu!

wow i'm glad that i had a 'girls talk' with a friend that i could actually trust here :)
wallaweyhhh, banyak betol drama dalam hidup ni

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

All is well iA

org cakap jgn mengeluh, tak baek
oh well i got so many things to say
but maybe i'll just talk about some stuffs

i'm BACK in Saskatoon, a place that I would love to explore more
hidden beauty, indescribable uniqueness n yes beautiful people
so here I am, meeting my awesome Toon hooligans again
i went back for 2months but they feel like it was more than that
'how was ur bf? did u lose weight? how's travelling? etc.
'i see ur awesome pictures'!
the first 2 questions mmg tak bole blah
well i didnt meet my so called bf, but i met my crazyyyy PHOENIX girlfriendsssss
i didnt have a good apetite for some reasons but i ate what i needed to eat
oh n i SWEAT a lot too!
balek malaysia turon 2.5 kg okaaay! gilo
basically the 2 months that i spent wasnt toooo great
time flew so fast eh?
i was a bit disappointed that i didnt get to have 'my own time with mom'
i wanted to travel or at least shopping would do
just like last time
she got other commitments i believe :(
but basically i had a good time with my family n relatives
2 years shouldnt feel like 20 years, hopefully
looking forward to graduate n earn my own money! :)

i had a bad dream a few days ago. something related to my family, a sad one n i even cried badly. n yet, i got a call 2 days ago from Malaysia. mak was admitted to the hospital. only Allah knows how i feel at that time. I was scared to death coz I'm still stuck in Canada if something happens. I was sick that I thought I needed my mom. But I guess mak needs her kids more for the moment. I've been updated by my bro n sys n even my niece about mak's conditions. haish jgnla homesick. All is well iA. yeah keep telling myself to b cool with it or at least act cool about it. get well soon mak! i wish i'm right beside u at this time :(

Monday, August 29, 2011


believe it or not
being silent is somehow the best weapon
the best thing that u can do
whenever u cant take it anymore
i'm a very sensitive person
n seriously i'm not that 'pure' inside
so yeah, it's better to keep it down
i mean not to fight back
coz i seriously agree with the malay idiom
'idiom' ke?
whatever laa
kerana pulut santan binasa
kerana mulut badan binasa
i believe that once i burst,
i may look VERY mean to everyone
n yes people, i really mean it

Wednesday, August 10, 2011


jodoh dan peretemuan
semua tu di tangan Tuhan
tak usah diingat bende yang lalu
mcm la org tu ingat kat kite

hey u woman!
be STRONG la
no matter how hard it's gonna b
ur gonna make it through
forget the past for real
only then everything's gonna b fine

ratio guys to girls kan dah nk balance
ape nk risau?

even if it takes yearssssss
jodoh tu takkan ke mana
tak payah dicari-cari
it's not something that i really have to worry about eh

n yes i do believe in Him
He has planned something really GOOD iA :)

Saturday, July 30, 2011


this is not the summer that i want
for some reasons
i just cant wait to go back to Canada
maybe i dont belong to this place anymore
or maybe
i'm too sensitive about everything
n even the day i landed
i've already stressed myself out too much
i'll come back again when everything has settled down 

Friday, May 13, 2011


i managed to 'like' someone again but after i get closer to that someone, (almost everyday jumpe or just online n do crazy stuffs or whatever) i dont feel anything anymore. ouch.not once or twice but couple of times already :( maybe i get bored easily or or they're just not my type! HAHAHA!  n please please please dont show interest in me coz i just hate it. i'd rather live without knowing how others feel about me. being in relationship is a serious matter for me coz i just dont give a sh** in my life! no more drama or whatever u wanna call it coz i cant handle it anymore. i'm happy being single but for some reasons i dont like how i feel right now. i'm not being ignorant or deniable of what's happening around me, but i think i'm just too scared of taking the risk! oh what a chicken! what should i do? *ok study rajin2 pastu habeskan duit JPA* perfect! :D

Saturday, May 7, 2011

mcm drama la plak!hehe

i never thought that my 'kampung' yg sgt la kecik where u'll always say 'what a small world' has soooooo many koreans!wow! i'm surprised to see lots of korean  guys came to play soccer with us today.haha! siap bole buat korean team lagi n play against us which is like combination of all continents in the world.ecewah!  rase mcm dlm drama la plak to hear them saying 'chinca' 'hyung' 'biyan' 'kamsahamida' etc etc. oh damn senyum lebar2 je todaaaay :D:D now i cant wait to go to Seoul coz my awesome korean friend made a good plan for us!ooopppa! *ok gedik gile*

Saturday, April 30, 2011

just bear with it :(

i dont wanna b an asshole
i dont wanna b selfish
no matter how hard it's gonna be
i just have to bear with it
stop complaining,
coz human beings are just like that
not everyone knows how to appreciate others
i shouldnt expect too much in life
so i'll take this as a challenge
to make me stronger insyaallah :)
 *only if everyone understands me, i dont think i'll hurt this much :( *

Sunday, April 24, 2011

hello :) eh salam sounds better i guess

ke hadapan blog yg dicintai. i miss u so much. sorry for 'ditching' u for almost 2 months but i guess i'm back now! my dearie place where i can share whatever i want; for the time being i'm pissed for so much sh** that happened but i know i have to endure pls b with me coz i'll need u in the future when i'm done's not easy. that's what i keep on telling myself n yeah it's something ugly that turned out to b truth. or maybe i should just use this blog to talk about my cakap look for the future, not the past.hell yeah. past is something that's gonna hurt me more :( goodnite world

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Say no to BF!

I know everyone thinks that i wrote this but trust me it wasnt meeeeee!! after having a thorough investigation, i found out that 3 of my frens involved. Omg, they hacked my fb n putting me in a very bad situation coz everyone thinks i'm so desperate!!! it happened on my birthday n everyone could see this stupid status on their home page.come on guys, i'm not that desperadooooo!! Please dont get it wrong, coz i just cant delete the status. i need to explain to everyone that it wasnt me who wrote it n the most important thing is that i hve to b fair to my fren.coz i hacked his fb n telling everyone that he's out of the closet, which simply means he's gay!! LOL.i know it's a bit too much since he's been attacked by his frens like crazy. But unfortunately, i even had worse than that!!! Everyone is making fun of me at school regarding the resume thingy n many people think i'm desperate for bf!! Durrhhh, my main point here, i dont give a damn to have a BF coz i like my single life now.well, i may flirt around, n hang out with any guys that i want but never crossed in my mind to have a serious relationship in the meantime! Of courseeee!! Being single is so much fun, so girlsss out there, SAY NO TO BF!! Suro mak je cari calon laki, ape susah!! Hahaha!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Heart attack!

I didnt expect anything on my birthday n i wasnt in a good mood either.Pee-em-es maybe! But anyhow i tried to give my very best expressions to everyone, so i act as cool as i can. All the wishes on fb n text messages really made my day, i mean according to southern hemisphere.if i'm home, i'll probably celebrate it with my sister n nephew since we have the same birthday. Homesick, feeling so depressed with everything, missing someone that i shouldnt, that's the worse state of emotion that i couldnt handle. I even waited for a call that will never happen again. So i decided to stay in school till very late, feeling anxious of what's gonna happen whn the clock strikes 12.i'm telling everyone that i'm not gonna throw a party n i'm not planning to have a party as well since i'm not in a good nothing happens at 12 coz i was walking home at that time :((

I opened the door. Assa..(trying to give salam) someone came out from the closet n seriously i swear to god that was the most scariest shock that i ever had! I screamed like crazy n i think i might even hugged my friend right away.but thank god i didnt coz that could b a big scandal in school.haha!shoot, seriously it was a 'HEART ATTACK' of the year, my heart hurts a lot but maybe because of too much shis*** too! Ooppss! n yeah they've actually planned so many things for me.well planned, seriously!! Too much drama, too much cheating so that i wouldnt notice anything. The cheesecake, gifts, food, movie, shisha n we stayed up till 4am. Who cares,it's my birthday!

So yeah that's the only picture that i got on my birthday.too much surprises that i couldnt snap anything.but one thing for sure i'll remember my 21st birthday forever.u guys are awesomeeee!! :))

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Monday, February 28, 2011

my toon town friends are just awesome! :)

reading week is over!! the week is not spent wisely but i had soooooo much fun with my friends here!! having our so called parties maybe every 2 days, doing some crazy stuffs, staying out late that we even had to wait for the first bus in the morning. those days were awesome coz i had crazzyyyyy people around. being in saskatoon isnt a bad choice after all coz i never thought i would meet those people in my life. they're from all over the world so as time passes we manage to learn different cultures n languages. during the break, i didnt travel at all, but only went to Table Mountain for snowboarding. omg, that was the best snowboarding trip so faaarrrr! tho i didnt manage to master the forward carving n the turns, but i'm still happy with my snowboarding skills right now. n i just love my snowboarddd!! winter i will aim for Whistler Mountain, the place where they used for winter olympics.

since i only slept for 1 hour 2 days ago, so yesterday i end up sleeping for almost 17 hourssss!! like seriously that was the longest sleep that i ever had in my life!! now i should just go for my new resolution which is not to skip claaassesss at all!! hehe

Sunday, January 30, 2011

jgn pertikaikan please!

kalau org kate itu rezeki, bole tak jgn pertikaikan?? dah tuhan nk bagi org tu 2nd chance, terime jela! aarghhh!!! and please, bile bercakap tu tlg fikir org kiri kanan dulu bole tak?? eee,, pissed me off betol!! and as for myself, even though i screwed up ICPU n didn't pass the cut-off point but at least i tried my best when i'm here!! and alhamdulillah because i learn from my mistake, i think i even did better than some people who passed the cut-off point! so what i wanna say here is that, tlg jgn pertikaikan rezeki org laen bole tak? mane la tau org yg x berape nk perform mase pre-university akan perform lagi gempak kaw2 tahap mega tu?? haaa, tuah aym nampak di kaki, tapi tuah manusia siapa yg tau? so fikir-fikirkan la ye!

this is just a thought yg dah lame disimpan. lame dah, dari dulu lagi.tapi today baru nk rase luahkan.ecewaaah!

Monday, January 24, 2011

hello there!

hey hey!i know it's been a while that i didnt update my blog. so many things going on that i just wanted to keep them for myself. oh yeah, it's been a year since the last time my heart broke into pieces. ecewaaah! but hey, i'm such a tough person now!u jerk, out of my way! i got my own life now.busy busy busy! i dont even have time to think about relationship or whatever u wanna call it but I'M SERIOUSLY HAPPY! this term would be more organized i guess. less time to go for shopping, more time for other activities. being hi-comm for MASA, BSA and joining Horticulture club is enough for the responsibilities part. i'm extremely satisfied with my so-called 'reducing stress' plans right now
working out at the gym, put more weight for the weightlifting part,
running at the track,increase # of laps per week
finish all the tracks for wall climbing as for now i've reached 4/6 tops (faster than what i was expecting)
halaqah every friday and later riadhah with the sisters
badminton for some fridays
yoga for at least once in fortnight to b more flexible. hehe
swimming class is still in consideration
squash when there's more time
more snowboarding trips when i get hired (no money no snowboarding)
futsal every thursday and if we get to the play-off i'll b more than happy
but being the champion for this term is even better :)

revision for any exams/midterms or whatever has to be done for at least one week before!!

aarrghhh!!n for those who may concern, I CANT STAND CRYING BABIES ANYMORE!!! do u know that i'm so pissed off to have that kind off ppl in my life?? screw them!! come on, i learn how to survive tooo!! and please please please do improve yourself!! ah kau! kalau anak bongsu takpe jugak nk mengade lebih2. haiyak! i always at the receiving end, so dont expect much from me! sorry nk emo kejap. hehe